Bound by Hatred (Born in Blood Mafia Chronicles #3)

by Cora Reilly

You are worth it.”

To be honest, she looked like I was a cockroach she wanted to squash under her boots.

“Fuck off before I decide to cut your throats,” Matteo said.

Luca hit the steering wheel. “I’m going to hunt down every fucking Russian if they hurt Aria.” “I’ll be at your side,” I said. I didn’t care how many Russians I’d have to cut into tiny pieces to get to Gianna. Damn it.

“Maybe you think you could live in the normal world, maybe you think you could date a normal guy, but you’d get bored, Gianna. Maybe you don’t want to admit it, but it excites you to be with someone like me. If a normal guy tells you he’d kill and torture to protect you, he’d be lying, exaggerating at best, but I’m making a promise I can keep.”

Not to mention that Matteo will probably move heaven and earth to find me.”

I didn’t care if I had to search the entire world, if I had to turn every single stone, if I had to squeeze information out of every fucking person in Amsterdam, I would find Gianna.

This was my chance to show her that she’d been wrong to run away, that I was the right guy for her.

If she liked to play with fire, fine. I didn’t mind getting burned. I’d walk through flames for her.

Nobody had ever looked at me like that, like I was the only source of water in a time of drought.

Romero grimaced. “Few people stab themselves in the brain.” “There’s always a first time for everything.” I chuckled but fell silent at a look from Luca. “Oh, come on,” I said. “It was funny.”

Matteo was a master manipulator.

Love is when you feel safe in someone’s arms, when he’s the first thing you want to see in the morning, love is surrendering. You risk getting hurt but you don’t care. You are willing to give someone the power to break your heart. Love means seeing someone at their worst and still seeing the good in them, love means someone is perfect for you despite their imperfections.”

Matteo twirled a strand of my hair around his finger. “I’d do it for you. You are my wife and I want to make you happy.” His smile was teasing and yet what he’d said had sounded sincere.

“I guess then that means I don’t care enough. Because letting you go? That’s the one thing I’ll never do.”

Aria leaned over to whisper in my ear. “I know you don’t want to see it but you and Matteo are like you were made for each other.”

“You can’t compare Aria to Gianna. They are like two different species. And I trust Aria absolutely. She caught a fucking bullet for me.” “Must be nice,” I muttered. “Gianna would probably applaud my shooter.”

“I don’t want to love you,” I whispered as I jerked to a halt, clenching my eyes shut. But I did. I did love Matteo.

“I know you feel like Matteo trapped you, that he ruined your life, but no matter what you think, he didn’t do it to make you miserable. For some unexplainable reason Matteo loves you. You don’t have to believe me. You can keep hating him but don’t leave him alone, not now. If you help me save his life, I’ll grant you freedom. I swear it on my honor and my life. Aria is here. She’s witness. You will get money, a new identity and even protection from the Outfit if you want. It’s all yours if you save his life.”

Why couldn’t I stop crying? I cried over a man like Matteo but had hardly shed a tear over Sid.

“No, it’s not the truth. When Luca mentioned his stupid offer, I had already started chest compressions. I didn’t know what I was doing and probably made every mistake possible, but I wasn’t just letting you die. I was doing everything I could even before Luca offered me freedom for your life. I would have never let you die, never. I know you don’t have to believe me. There’s no reason why you should. I could be lying for all you know.”

“I knew the moment I saw you lying in your own blood that I didn’t want to lose you. I knew it, but I still didn’t want to admit it to anyone. I was so stupid and stubborn. I was being bitchy Gianna like usual. And once I’d agreed to Luca’s offer, I was too proud to tell him that I didn’t even want his stupid freedom. I didn’t want to leave you, didn’t want another life. I probably would have been miserable alone but too proud to admit it if you hadn’t broken down. It felt like I was giving up, like I was admitting defeat, which is so idiotic. How can love ever be a defeat?”

“No,” she said firmly. “I’ve run from my emotions for too long.” She braced herself on her palms and leaned forward. “I want to be with you, Matteo. By God, I know I shouldn’t want it, but it doesn’t matter anymore. I’m sick of ignoring my heart. I love you.”

“I love you, Gianna. I’ve fucking loved you for a long time.”

Matteo had held up a mirror to my face and showed me who I really was and where I belonged.

It had taken a long time but I realized I could feel free, be free, even when I was bound to Matteo.