All The Things I Never Said

by Mae Krell

i hope that one day you’ll forget all the pain you’ve endured and just learn to be happy

You said you didn’t care for me anymore so you went your way and i went your way too but when you looked my way you saw nothing because to you i had become invisible.

so, well thank you and goodbye and hopefully you won’t forget the color of my eyes or my smile and hopefully my memory will linger in your mind like the stars do when the dark rises but not drift away when night creeps out

The Happiest Of Sads How could you make my lips curve upwards in happiness and my eyes close and open while dropping waves of tears onto the shore that is my face at the same time?

What is more powerful a thought, or a gun? a gun gives the opportunity but a thought pulls the trigger

But when you are alone at 3 in the morning everything you have ever tried to forget comes flooding back at once like a tsunami tide and all your demons collide and all you can hope for is that if you close your eyes it’ll all go away

Every Bird Has A Broken Song If you’re a bird i’m a bird but if you expect me to stay with you after you push me off our little tree or after you treat me badly and hurt me I won’t Maybe the first time i’ll stay and maybe the second time i will too But soon later when you push me down I won’t be able to get up and maybe my wing will be hurt and I won’t be able to fly anymore And then what will you do? will you help me, or will you continue sitting in what used to be our little tree and watch me fall?

just like my everything is you and you don’t care about me

And really it’s not you that I miss even though it seems that way sometimes no it’s not you I miss it’s the memories we had and the fact that you actually cared about me and that I had someone to talk to

I finally realized that it wasn't our adventures, the words you said to me or the way your eyes lit up when you spoke of me that I missed It was you and all the little things that made that up and I finally realized that I could never feel this for anyone else because I am obsessively and hopelessly in love with you

and I know I swore to you i’d be ok but sometimes ok isn’t as happy as it seems sometimes ok is broken promises and wasted nights lying on the floor waiting for someone to find you sometimes ok is hoping he wont leave when you tell him you’ve done it again and you’re so very sorry sometimes ok is hoping that one day you’ll be “normal” that maybe one day you saying that you’re ok will actually mean that you’re fine

truth is as much as I tell myself that it's the memories I miss it's actually you. I want you next to me again

too bad that the places I feel I belong are the ones that I don't and the places I feel I don't belong are the ones where I do

but now that I'm going through this torture