My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She's Sorry

by Fredrik Backman

Elsa had been very afraid that night, and she had asked Granny what they would do if one day their world crumbled around them. And then Granny had squeezed her forefingers hard and replied, “Then we do what everyone does, we do everything we can.”

“Never mess with someone who has more spare time than you do,”

Granny used to say. Elsa used to translate that as, “Never mess with someone who’s perky for her age.”

Granny always used to say that those sorts of shirts were a good thing, because the horse functioned as a sort of manufacturer’s warning that the shirt was highly likely to be transporting a muppet.