Invisible Bars

by Alecia J

“Imanio Zaire Kors!” Giselle shrieked like she just caught me snorting cocaine off a Bible and wasn’t used to me threatening people before brunch.

So stop with the act like you don’t know what it feels like to split one meal between three people, heat the house with the oven door open, stand in food stamp lines, use candles when the lights got cut off, listen to yo’ stomach growl while saying “I already ate” so your kids could eat first, sell personal stuff just to cover rent, or boil water on the stove just to take a bath. I could go on.”

“Listen to me, Naji, life is… too short,” he continued. “People say that all the time, treating it like empty words, but I mean it. Life moves quickly, almost in the blink of an eye. One minute, you’re excitedly making plans for next summer, dreaming of lazy beach days and unforgettable adventures, and the next… you’re just hoping to survive the week. You think you have time, but time doesn’t ask for your schedule or what you dreamed of doing; it just keeps on rolling along, indifferent to your wishes.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck—snakes in my soup—Fuck!” I blurted out.

i cant read this at work...

“Don’t touch me, fish fry forehead!” I yelled, loud and sharp, like the words had a mind of their own.

“Bro, how the hell are you so calm right now?” Chi asked Gatez. “She just called one of us a fish fry forehead and cursed out somebody’s orthopedic shoes!”

My breath caught. “Nnn-No! None of that! I—I swear, I promise!” I cried, the words crashing out of me like a dam had burst. “I won’t say anything! I didn’t see anything—I didn’t hear anything! I just—Crispy titty croutons!”

im neveer gonna get through this

Chi’s face twisted with a mix of sympathy and confusion. “Damn. So... she’s not cursed?” I gave him the slowest side-eye in human history. “Nah, nigga! It’s not demonic possession; it’s a medical condition.”

Chi shrugged. “Aight. But if I catch y’all cuddling, I’m taking pictures. Glitchy and The Grim Reaper. It’s a vibe.”

“You don’t care? Bro, the girl threw a tic so hard yesterday she yelled ‘Pancake Jesus’! What the hell you think she gon’ say in front of yo’ folks? The board of investors? What if she tic out mid-event and start shouting Bible verses at the ribbon-cutting? ‘In the name of Leviticus, let there be condos!’ You think that's gon' help yo’ stock price?”

“Well, look… you know I gotta talk my shit, but if you do end up marrying Glitchy with the unpredictable vocabulary, I’m all in. I’m talkin’, matching suits, customized cufflinks, the whole nine. And I’m bringing them big ass speakers I took from Blu to the wedding. Might as well let Blu’s system live on since he don’t.”

“Cupcakes and consequences! The crusty ones from the gas station, not the ones with the swirls!” I attempted to shout, my voice a little hoarse from days of barely speaking.

I wrapped my hands around the warm mug first, taking a few cautious sips. It tasted fresher, richer—like the mint leaves were handpicked by bougie monks in a serene garden of generational wealth.

“I smell betrayal and burnt toast! If they offer you pineapple pizza, say no! It’s a trap!” I blurted without warning.

“Alexa works for the Illuminati, don’t act brand new!”

Imanio’s voice stayed quiet, level. “The girls he let stay in that upstairs room? That wasn’t kindness; that was business. He’d rent it out, charm them, get them comfortable... then sell them off. You were staying right next to a trap and didn’t even know it.”

damn.. there i was thinling Blu was a nice man in a bad place

“Well, whatever you decide to do in life, you know you always have my vote. But does this girl even know marriage is on the table?” “She knows; I gave her a day to think about it.” “A day? 24 hours? Really, Imanio?” “What? You think I should change it to 48 hours?”

48 aint no better hun

But wait—Tourette! That makes sense! The walk! The time she yelled ‘salami nipples’ on live TV—I remember thinking, she’s iconic and unpredictable!

difference doesn’t mean broken; it just means you got a rhythm most folks too loud or too scared to hear.”

Don’t ever shrink yourself to make other folks comfortable,” she said, her voice like a soft sermon. “God made you loud for a reason; loud in spirit and loud in truth. And baby, even your silence got volume.”

“People gon’ misunderstand you whether you whisper or shout. So you might as well show up full—unapologetic, unmuted, and unashamed. That ticking, that twitching, that trembling voice of yours? That ain’t weakness, baby; that’s your power dressed in a different robe.”

I rubbed my temples and tried again. “Alright. Say one of our properties catches negative press from a failed inspection. What’s your first step?” She perked up. “Oh! I’d post a cute selfie in front of the building and put ‘vibes were off today, but we still slay.’ Hashtag damage control.” Chi looked over at me and mouthed, “This can't be real”.

“Fuuuuuuuuck your eyeballs! Blink, you creepy walrus!” I snapped. “Ain’t you supposed to be reading vows, not reading my soul?!”

The past doesn’t always let go easy, but sometimes, just sometimes, you can reach back and pull someone forward with you.

“Damn,” I muttered, feeling a lump in my throat. “So all that time… you were trapped?” He nodded slowly. “I call it… invisible bars, son.” “Invisible bars?” I repeated, confused. “It’s not always chains or jail cells keeping a person locked up; sometimes it’s guilt, obligation, family expectations, or even pride,” he explained.

I want real. I’ve been fake so long, I’m suffocating in it.”

Giselle, money changes your clothes, not your bloodline. Remember that.”

“No, b-babe. It looks like life has already dragged her. And when God humbles somebody, you don’t interfere; you just step aside and let the lesson finish teaching.”

“You fake fridge magnet of a woman! Sorry—nope—no I’m not! Trip on the hem of your karma, you classless champagne gargler!”

Naji, when insecure women can’t compete with your presence, they’ll try to stain your image… literally.”

“Naji, sometimes we have to decide that this is the last time that these people will make me feel this way, and stand on it… and I did that day.

You don’t bring someone’s pain to the table dressed up like a gift. This girl has been through hell and finally found some peace, and you tried to shatter it in one night. For what?”

Renee added, “She’d better start reading Proverbs and minding her own business next time. Start with chapter 11… arrogance leads to disgrace.”

“Are you her publicist or mine?” “Both!” she chirped. “She’s your wife, so y’all come as a package now! Besides, you pay me enough to represent the both of you… and maybe even another person.” Saroya muttered that last part. I raised a brow. “I do?” Saroya whistled. “Did I say that?” Her eyes shifted quickly to her watch.

Who said thaaat?

don’t just give your body away because it feels new or exciting. You d-don’t have to be in love, but you do need to be sure that he sees you, hears you and you respects more than your curves and your smile.”

“Virginity isn’t some prize to be won or shame to be rid of; it’s just… a choice,” I continued. “And it should be yours… not his… not anybody else’s.”

“Good… because I’m starving! All I had this morning was some hotel fruit that tasted like it missed its calling as a paper towel.”

Crazy thing is… we hadn’t even known each other two full months. But love isn’t measured in hours or weeks; it’s measured in moments and how someone makes your spirit settle when the world wants to spin you apart.

“A man’s first duty after marriage is to his wife. Once I said, ‘I do,’ my loyalty shifted. My job is to protect her, cover her, and choose her—over everybody, even you. See, a wife ain’t supposed to compete with nobody’s mama; not for time, not for respect, not for protection. That’s weakness, and any man who lets that shit happen ain’t a man… he’s still a son. So yeah, every time, I’m choosing her. That’s not betrayal, that’s manhood.”

“Respect is earned, not inherited. Family doesn’t give anyone a discount on basic d-decency.”

“Contamination! Cootie committee! Sorry! I’m serious!”

Sometimes love doesn’t show up loud; sometimes it hides in the shadows, praying for you, even when it can’t stand beside you.