Confession (Constantine Brothers #2)

by Rina Saint

Quinn’s back goes ramrod straight at my sudden nearness. He’s not exactly a touchy-feely person, but I don’t see him tense like this with anyone but me. I don’t get it, and it’s very annoying. I mean, I talk to him more than to anyone. He’s the only person I let see how much it fucked me up when Nonna Maria died last year. And I know he’s not intimidated by me, so what the fuck?

Usually, I maintain a decent physical distance to avoid this response from him, but it’s been harder these past six weeks. There’s like a fucking magnet on him or something.

Quinn rarely says my name. It’s weird to hear it in his voice. I’m sure that’s why it makes my heart jump.

I swear to god, straight men are so dumb. They have it so easy with women. It’s a lot harder to impress a man. Of course, it would help if the man I’m in love with was actually gay. But I’m a glutton for punishment.

Sometimes when I’m alone, I wonder if my obsession with him is self-sabotage or some shit. Like, as long as I’m in love with Vitali, I’m totally immune to harm because nothing can come of it. But that explanation falls apart as soon as I’m in his presence—because nothing hurts like being around him. And yet, it’s the only place I want to be.

“You were in there, asshole! Did you think I was gonna fucking leave you?” Apparently, even in the dark alley, he can see my surprise. “Jesus Christ, you fucking did. For fuck’s sake, Quinn.”

How did I not notice my attraction to him before? Because looking at him now? Accepting the attraction for what it is? I realize that it’s always been there—because it doesn’t feel new. It only feels like new clarity. What the hell is wrong with me that I didn’t understand it before?

Quinn’s lips tug. He’s embarrassed. Fuck, he’s cute. What in the goddamn hell is wrong with me that I didn’t see it? Two fucking years he’s lived here. Am I stupid?

But this is different. Quinn was already not allowed to leave my life, something I didn’t fully realize until he got hurt. And he may think I’m experimenting, but I’m not. This will be different for me, but I already know, from everything I know about him, and definitely from the way he blew me, that he’s perfect for me.

And I’ve lived just fine with Vitali for years. I know exactly how to be in love with him from within my isolated space. But I don’t know how to be in love with him like this, with him constantly breaking through my carefully built walls. And it’s not even that I’m afraid he’ll realize that I’m in love with him. What I’m really afraid of is how my need for him, which I’ve kept small and controlled and invisible for years, is exploding into something way too big, something beyond my ability to control.

I feel a strange mix of relief and sadness and understanding. Roman doesn’t want me to see him like this, but he trusts Lucas so much that he yielded to him. It’s so beautiful and so heartbreaking. My throat tightens as I watch them. Their connection. Their trust.

I love those two so much

“I love you,” I finally confess. When I do, other words spill out in a rush. “I have for years. I have ever since I laid eyes on you. I fell in love with you the first goddamn second, and I’ve only fallen more in love with you every second since.”

“But you’re wrong,” he tells me. “You’re so goddamn fucking wrong because I do love you and I really always have and I don’t know why it took me so long to understand it and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I was stupidly slow. I’m sorry that I’ve been so fucking impatient with you. I’m sorry that I hurt you and I am so fucking sorry that you got this far ahead of me tonight. And don’t you ever do any shit like this again because you would fucking kill me.”

“And that’s a lot of words, so let me boil it back down, Quinn. I fucking love you.”

“I fucking love you.” “Stop.” “I fucking love you.” He completely shatters. His whole body starts shaking. He pulls away from me so damn hard that he’s out of the bed before I can react, but I’m right behind him as he falls to the floor, hunched in on himself and shaking with sobs that he refuses to let out. I force my arms into the curled-up space of his body, grabbing him around the middle and hauling him back into the bed. “Please,” I beg because I’m crying now too. “Please, Quinn.” I don’t even know exactly what I’m asking for, but he’s gives it to me anyway. He rolls over in my arms and wraps his around me. His body fully entwines with mine. His face buries against my throat, like he finally believes me, like he finally trusts me. And he finally cries like I think he’s needed to for years. And so do I.

“I need you to trust me when I say I love you. I need you to believe me, deeply and absolutely. And even if you don’t need that? I certainly do. Do you understand?”

It’s strange maybe for two people who’ve never had relationships to have one together. But Quinn is right for me in a way that no one else could ever be. I feel it. I know.

“I love you too,” I whisper, feeling softer than I ever have in my life, feeling like maybe, just for a minute, it’s safe for me to be that way.

not alone. Vitali and Roman are already inside, and Sasha is right behind me. Alesso is in front. Looking up at the camera, he knocks on the door.

I'm confused.... Didnt Alesso literally just die????

There was, actually. A number of Alesso’s men died to make everything believable, but all that came his way was a blank.

Ahhh

He listened to me. That feels really good. It makes me feel like I can be something for him like he is for me. I needed that.