Code Word (Atrous, #3)

by N.R. Walker

He stared at me for the longest time. “You what?” “I’m an idiot.” He snorted out a teary laugh. “No, I got that part.” But then more tears ran down his cheek. “You said⁠—” “That I’m in love with you,” I replied. Pretty sure that was the third time I’d said it, not that I was counting. “I always have been. I just never realized what it was until I didn’t have it anymore.” Luke shook his head and tried to speak, more tears spilling down his cheeks. “It took you breaking up with me for me to realize. I’ve spent the last week either drunk or crying on the floor. Everything’s been fucking awful. Then today I tried to be normal and I went out in public, but it was terrible, and I ended up at your house. I found all the photos you left on the floor and the song you wrote.” I looked down at the crumpled song. “And I can see it now, you and me, and what was always there. I don’t know what any of it means, but I just had to find you. I was going in-fucking-sane, Luke. And everyone saw it, so that was great. Maddox can eat an entire bag of dicks; I don’t fucking care. Amber almost had to lie to the Mexican government for me, and Becca drove me to the airport and told me not to come back without you. And I flew economy, Luke. Economy. It was awful.”