Hot for Slayer

by Ali Hazelwood

I have yet to accept my new circumstances. That, I fear, will be my demise.

My motto is: If I have to suck someone dry every few weeks, why not make it a Goldman Sachs executive?

LMAO

the real problems are rarely the ones we spend our time worrying about.

Our species has a clear case of hot-girl tummy, and I’m grateful to the twenty-first century for giving us a final diagnosis.

😂😂😂😂

“It was one-sided,” he tells me after he’s done chewing. “From you.” “What?” “The dislike.” “I assure you, it was not.” “And I assure you, when I look at you, I feel anything but that.”

“I might not remember my name, or anything about who I am. But I could never be near you and not know exactly what you are to me.”

“I know your smell. I know your skin. Your hair. It’s all familiar. I have it all memorized. And I dream of you—of this. So many dreams, all so different, we must have done it a million times, in a million different ways. Tell me what you’re hiding from me, let’s get this over with, and then let’s do it a million more times.”

He will live forever through the memories of those who outlast him. I will remember him for as long as I live, and as long as I carry him in my heart, he will be here.

🤍

“Aethelthryth, nothing would make me happier than having you with me here, or in any other place that I will call