Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway: How to Turn Your Fear and Indecision into Confidence and Action

by Susan Jeffers

One of the most important lessons one has to learn in life is how to give, and therein lies an answer to fear. As babies we represent the ultimate of neediness. We come into this world as total takers. We have to take, or we will die. Our survival is tied up with the world nurturing us. We give little back. We don’t care what time we wake our parents when we are hungry, or how loudly we scream and bother the neighbors when we want to be picked up. Yes, parents often get a feeling of joy from the smile or the touch of their child and, in that sense, the child is a giver—but I doubt if the child spent the night pondering: “My life is abundant. I have so much to give away that I think I’ll reward my parents with a great big smile tomorrow morning.” No, their “gift” is on a rather primitive or reflexive level. In fact, a hungry belly in the morning will produce only loud shrieks of impatience. As the years pass, we function as more and more independent beings, able to take care of ourselves—or so it appears. We dress ourselves, we feed ourselves, we earn a living. Yet there seems to be a part of us that never progresses much beyond the crib. Metaphorically, we remain frightened that no one will come to relieve our hunger—for food, money, love, praise and so on. Any relief in the way of “food” is only temporary; we know the hunger will come again.