The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts

by Gary Chapman

Isolation is devastating to the human psyche. That is why solitary confinement is considered the cruelest of punishments.

Our most basic emotional need is not to fall in love but to be genuinely loved by another, to know a love that grows out of reason and choice, not instinct. I need to be loved by someone who chooses to love me, who sees in me something worth loving.

Love doesn’t keep a score of wrongs. Love doesn’t bring up past failures.

Forgiveness is the way of love.

emotions themselves are neither good nor bad. They are simply our psychological responses to the events of life.

We are influenced by our personality but not controlled by it.

Love cannot be demanded. We can request things of each other, but we must never demand anything.

People tend to criticize their spouse most loudly in the area where they themselves have the deepest emotional need.

Allowing oneself to be used or manipulated by another is not an act of love.

The “in-love” experience that we discussed in chapter 3 is on the level of instinct. It is not premeditated;

love is something you do for someone else, not something you do for yourself.

I know in fact that love is a miracle worker.

Sexual intercourse is a bonding experience. It unites two people in the deepest possible manner.