Starve

by A.J. Merlin

God forbid the mental patients get smut or romantasy, I suppose. Who knows what we might do with such clandestine, taboo topics?

“They’ve never had someone say hi to them before. They liked the message on your window.”

“We should talk about how weird that is, because it makes you sound like a stalker.” “I’d have to be human to be a stalker, wouldn’t I?”

“You’re such a good girl, Moro,” Cairo praises, totally ignoring me. “Even if you did start barking and wanted to rip up the couch today because you were bored without Fern. That’s okay. I’m bored without her too.”

“My legs aren’t broken.” “Maybe I like carrying you.” “Maybe you’re a stalker.”

She doesn’t deserve my apology. I don’t deserve to feel this way.

“You are so not touching me right now. Not when you’re this bloody.”

“That’s because I’m usually hungry.” He chuckles. “So it takes a lot for me to think about anything else. But I’m not hungry now. You have all of my attention. All of my affection.”

I can’t move. I can barely breathe. I need⁠— The driver’s door opens suddenly, and I turn my head to see Cairo, soaked from the rain and staring down at me.

“There are so many ways I want to have you,” he interrupts. “Just because I’m a monster, doesn’t mean they’re all like that. Some of them…” He cups my face in his hands, pressing his face to mine. “Some of them are gentle, and sweet. Because you are a thing to be cherished and kept warm.”

Mine. I wonder if he knows how possessive he sounds when he says it. How intimate, and absolute.

But I gently explained to her that she needs a day off from being the fierce protector, then I closed the door in her face. Like a monster.

“I’m fine, okay?” he murmurs, and his eyes find mine in the moonlight, in the courtyard of the mental hospital where all of this began.

“If you aren’t starved, then why do you cling to the creature who gives you unfiltered affection?

“You are desperate, Fern,” she coos, pressing herself closer. “And the reason this hurts so badly is because you know that if Cairo really does die, you will starve.”