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Kindle Notes & Highlights
by
Jahquel J.
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July 9 - July 11, 2025
The moment you borrow another’s flame to light your path, you’ve already dimmed your own. Imitation isn’t inspiration — it’s desperation. There’s only one me. Like there is one you.
“Sim, you better not fucking die on us, nigga… you got Elijah and your seed coming into the world. You already promised your next seed was gonna be my God baby… can’t have Goon ass out here upstaging me.”
“You not losing either of them. Quasim just being fucking dramatic. That nigga owe me like ten stacks because I won a bet… his ass better not die.” I looked up at him as he smiled down at me. “Cappy, not funny.” “I’m dead fucking serious… matter fact, let me go ask his new wife where he keep his bread.” He continued as he kissed my forehead a few times, trying to make me feel better. “Meer ain’t going anywhere … he pissy as hell. They not letting him through the pearly gates smelling like that.”
“She said what she needed to say as a wife, Blaze. Don’t fault her because she was more concerned with you.”
“The one thing your brother has taught me is faith. A man who had experienced so much loss, had the faith the size of Texas. As bad as I want to sit here and cry, I know he’s going to come out of this. We’re going to come out of this as a family, and this will be a chapter in our past…. Meer, I need you to hold onto that with me. Have that faith that Simmy has instilled in all of us.”
“It ain’t on us… it’s in us… right, Pops?” He looked at his son and smiled. “Already know. I need you to listen to your wife and heal. Trust that I got both of them, and I’m gonna tear the fucking east coast up while you rest.”
I’m gonna look at his scans and paperwork and make sure shit is right… they don’t call me Dr. Delgato for nothing, feel me?”
“B, just because I’m a dentist doesn’t mean that I’m not skilled in any of this… Hassan ain’t the only doctor around this bitch.”
“Lies, Anjo. I can get over a lot of shit, but lying to me isn’t one of them. You’re fucking shaking in my arms, baby, tell me what’s going on. How can I love you if I don’t know your pain?”
Fuck soft girl era. He put me in my secure girl era. A place where I felt safe, seen, and secured.
“Dad wouldn’t leave me… he… he’s my dad. He promised, he doesn’t break promises… never!”
“That girl was small as shit… beautiful, but she small as hell. Let’s not act like I’m body shaming her and shit… fucking world too damn sensitive. They called fat women fat bitches for years, and now everybody wanna be talking about body shaming once the skinny bitches start getting called skinny.”
“This going to be our life, Lucia? You reminding me why we’re married in the first place? Always tossing that shit in my face like yo low self esteem ass ain’t trap me because you ran through all the detectives in your station? How they only wanna use you for fun, never to be the wife… what about that mental health leave you had to take after you fucked and fell in love with your married partner? I married you because I had no other choice… don’t mistake that for love because this dick is for everybody… including the bitch I took out the country.”
“Whenever you pray, I hear your voice and I’m right there beside you. I’m never going anywhere. The happier you become, the less you need me around… I’m not in pain anymore. Keep being happy and don’t feel bad, okay?”
“Promise me that you will continue to be happy. Protect Anjo, Elijah and my sister. Promise me that you will be strong for them and let them be strong for you, too. Nobody can be strong like you, Daddy, but let them try… okay?”
“Hoe, is you a fucking wizard?” I nearly screamed, trying to understand what the fuck just happened. How the fuck did we come through this door, and everything was completely different? I felt like I stepped into a Granger novel with a talking cat named Quan.
Baby Bop is pregnant, too, right?” Me and Corleon both looked at Menace as he stared between us, confused, with a serious expression on his face. “Her name is fucking Blair, Menace!” I couldn’t help but to laugh because he never seemed phased whenever Corleon constantly corrected his ass. “I know how pregnant women can get.” “Very hormonal… they need a lot of support and low stress.” He screwed his face up. “You said you wanna fuck the stress out my wife?”
“Quinton, you may have come to me grown, but I raised you. You have loved my daughter correctly from the moment that you saw her. Have you both been through some crazy mess? Yes. But you remained. When you could have run, you remained and still loved on her. Where you fell short, you raised your boys not to. You have shown the love you have for your boys… taking out your brother is not something that is easy, and I don’t care how easy you make it seem. Where you fell short as an older brother, you have shown Moochie how to be the best big brother to Dumplin.”
“I owe you my life, Hassan. There was a time when I wanted someone to take me out. I wanted to leave this earth and never return. You get what you ask for, but you saved me. Saved me so I could be here for my children and wife. So my wife didn’t have to mourn me… there’s no way I could ever repay you.”
“You already did… Had you not been you… I wouldn’t have been able to save you. This shit is all in the stars, all mapped out and we don’t have a say in how the universe loops us together… feel me?”
“Stop fucking with me… I may be unstable on my feet, but that finger still works fine on a trigger, my love.”
“The problems I had before we got married… thought I had a handle on them, Anjo. Thought I was good.”
“Marriage didn’t heal me, my love. I thought it would have… it just turned the volume up on everything that I never dealt with.”
“I don’t want to lose you, my love… I cannot lose you, baby. You make my life complete. Shit hasn’t been fair, and I apologize to you. I took my darkness out on you, and all you were trying to do was be the light… I’m not a perfect man, Anjo, but I’m a trying man. A man that can recognize his own bullshit and fix it.”
“I’ve always been fighting for us while you’ve been fighting with yourself. I need you to take this time to figure out what you want, Quasim. If you’re in it, then I need you to be in it when shit is dark, and when things aren’t. I love you and that has never been the question… I’m not staying where I’m not heard. I’ve done that before, and I’m not doing it again.”
“Have some decorum, Kobe.” I said. “No, you all need to realize that she has a mental illness and while there isn’t anything wrong with that, she is receiving the help, and that is more than some people do. I feel for you, babe, but you have a man that wants to love the socks off you… stop being scared and be honest with him.”
“Gotta let go of that pride when it comes to your wife, bro. You can’t bring all that hard shit from the streets home. With her, you gotta shed the armor… she wants different when you are behind those walls.” He paused. “She already knows what you’re capable of out there… what you’ve done and carry. What she needs is you… raw, real, and open.”
You can still be strong and still let her in… the king always needs his queen.”
“Bitch too nice…there’s three bitches that I hate… Zuri, Shai, and fucking Star Cromwell.” He growled, saying their names. “Just say you hate women, nigga.”
Get em, Blaze.
I like taking lives. Holding someone’s fear in the palm of my hands.” “I’m not scared.” “And I’m not gonna kill you.” I looked confused. “You’re not gonna kill me?” He smirked. “I’m gonna kill the fuck out of you.”
“I had a lot of down time since you sat me down… did a lot of damage to my own family, thinking of all the ways I was going to kill you. Aside from that, I found out the reason for the hit on your brother and I’m fucking glad I did the shit. When you go and meet him… cause that’s where you going, ask him why.”
“From the back of the ear to the other ear… bleeds out faster.” She winked. I nodded. “Yes, mama.”
I pushed for every night I slept by my toilet alone because I was fighting cancer. Every piece of hair I lost, every time a tear slid down my cheek when I sat in that chair and was injected with that poison.