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by
Adelyn Birch
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”
you’re riding an emotional roller coaster, with no way to stop the ride and get off. He or she is doing this on purpose to increase his power and control over you and to make you even more desperate for his love. You have become the proverbial lab rat frantically pushing the lever for a randomly dispensed treat. The rat thinks of nothing else, and neither will you. The bond can become even stronger during this phase, believe it or not. It’s a well-known psychological phenomenon known as traumatic bonding.
He or she refuses to hear what it is you want to talk about; instead, the issue becomes your emotion to it, which the manipulator says is unacceptable.
Shame is a feeling of deep humiliation, and one thing a manipulator loves to do is to make their victim feel humiliated.
the manipulator refuses to communicate and uses emotional or physical withdrawal as punishment. This is commonly called the silent treatment, stonewalling, or withholding. It conveys contempt and communicates that you are not worth the manipulator’s acknowledgement of your existence, let alone her time, love, attention, or consideration.
