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Kindle Notes & Highlights
by
Quil Carter
Read between
October 14 - October 18, 2020
“Do it. Scream, bite, kill… do what you must, just do not internalize it,” Elish commanded me. “I have dealt with chimera youth. I have trained Jade and I have counselled many others. You need to drain the infection, and to a chimera that is through blood, destruction, and revenge. I have no revenge for you, so scream.”
“I am King Silas’s clone. I’m better than all of them,” I snapped, before I started to stalk back down the road. Elish’s cold laugh sounded behind me. “Yes, and Jade is a genetically engineered chimera with strands from our most successful, superior brothers. Caligula as well. All three chimeras in your generation have been selectively bred. You? You are the genetic copy of someone so full of madness he has driven his own hyper-intelligent mind into insanity. You may have chimera enhancements but you are not better than us… quite the contrary. You are prone to insanity, susceptible to
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Seeking counsel and help from someone who holds more experience is not a shortcoming. It does not say anything against your pride or dominance. You would be a fool to convince yourself to already know everything, and a bigger fool to convince yourself you know more than me.”
“You were the first person to treat me like a real human being, even though I was broken. Do you have any idea what you proved to me… when you killed me? That you loved me so much… you would put me out of my suffering?”
“The world deserved what ended up happening. We just showed it what it had done to us. We showed the world our hurt.”
“I agreed to help Silas, and I have a perfect way of helping him.” “By killing him?” “Of course.”
“I got up and saw he was sitting on the very edge of his chair making quils, like very edge so he was practically falling off. Do you know why?” I looked at Teejay who was right beside me and smiled at him. “Because Biff was asleep on that chair and he didn’t want to disturb him. If I was awake, Reaver would’ve just…” Tears started to well in my eyes. “He would’ve just kicked him off to maintain his air of… his air of just being Reaver. But when no one’s looking… he’s so sweet to him.”
Elish shook his head beside me. “He reminds me of Drake… a lot.” He looked down at the dog. “He’s big enough now I could fucking ride him,” I said. And was tempted to do just that, his head almost came up to my chest now. “Yes, it’s usually the opposite when with Drake,” Elish replied casually.
We were all crazy in the greywastes, in pre-Fallocaust terms. We were all insane here. How can this grey world hold anything with a sound mind? Every single one of us was fucked the moment we took our first breath of radiation.
Drake did a small shuffle-like dance at this, like a tailless dog trying to wag his backside. “I’m happy, and happy Jade will come back, and Elish. I miss Elish. Remember the time he gave me those chocolates that were supposed to be for Jade? And Jade accidently tripped me but Elish knew it was on purpose and he slapped Jade on the back of the head, and Jade swore and him and then Elish–”
Killian a chimera? That would be one horrible chimera. Discount bin quality.
“Why did Sky want to die?” Perish’s face tightened and I saw a glisten in his eye, a shred of humanity I hadn’t seen in a long time. “Because Sky knew he was a bad person and he hated himself for it. He was cruel to Silas, the man who loved him more than anything, and he was tired of hurting him. Even though Silas took his abuse and loved him all the same… Sky couldn’t stand the man he had become. He explained this to me and after years of watching him slip into his own insanity I finally agreed to help him kill himself. We found a way, and we did it.”
Small, sick, bad head. Yeah, that was how it ended up for a lot of people who got mixed up with chimeras.
Garrett highlighted some text, but it might’ve well been Mexican to me.
Goodbye, Edward. Now you’re… Deadward.
aren’t you ninety-one now?” “I am.” “You look really good for your age.”
I tried to math out in my head how much time I was saving being on the quad, but my math had always been restricted to what I could count on my fingers. Leo had tried teaching me mutiplifractions or whatever they were fucking called but it never clicked in my head. You didn’t need to do a math problem to blow someone’s head off.
“Everything ends up being a game. When you’re my age and you have seen everyone you love die, you will stop seeing people as people. They are nothing but ants in an ant hill, and you – nothing but a god among insects.”
I was the Reaper and he was the Ghost, and his soul was long overdue for collection.
“Goodbye, sweety. Thank you for showing me mercy. Thank you for loving me through my madness, and thank you for showing me there is still good in this world.”
I will give up everything for you, Killian. I will give up revenge. I will give up hate.
