The Ascended (The Aesymarean Duet, #1)

by Bree Grenwich

"Look how badly your body betrays you."

"Beg me," he commanded, mouth hovering just above where I wanted him most. "Beg me to taste you."

"When I watched you, Thais, I so badly wished it was me."

"Because I can't have you," he said through gritted teeth. "Because every time I look at you, I want to—" He stopped mid-sentence, dragging his hand down his face. "You have no idea what you're playing with," he finally said. "Enlighten me." And then he was moving towards me. "You threw yourself at me like some desperate thing, and I had the sense to walk away, yet you continue to test me."

"You want to know what I am?" His voice dropped to a whisper that caressed my every nerve ending. "I'm a man who's been hard for you since the moment I laid eyes on you. I'm a man who's spent every night since then stroking myself to thoughts of you."

"I'm a man who dreams about having you spread out beneath me, begging me to fill you, to claim you, to make you mine in every filthy way I can imagine." His eyes burned into mine. "So tell me—do you still think I'm hiding from what I want?" "Then take it," I whispered, my voice barely steady. "Take what you want."

"Stop talking." But his grip tightened, and I could see the war raging behind his eyes. "Make me," I challenged.

"Tell me what you want me to do to you," he commanded. "Fuck me," I whispered, the admission sending a thrill through me. "Right here."

"I will not touch you, and you will not touch me," he murmured, his voice dropping to that dangerous silk that made my skin prickle. Before I could react, he guided my hand to my thigh, sliding it upward. "But I will watch you touch yourself," he whispered, his lips a breath away from my ear.

"Tell me something," he said, his voice dropping even lower as he watched me. "How often do you think of me when you're alone?"

"Tell me what you're thinking," I whispered, emboldened by the raw desire I saw in his eyes. "I'm thinking," he said, his voice strained, "that I'll never be able to concentrate at my desk ever again." I couldn't fight back the smile that curved my lips. "Is that all?" "So eager," he purred. "But since you asked so nicely, I'm also thinking about my mouth on every inch of your skin, tasting you until you're sobbing with need," he continued, his voice dropping low. "About watching you fall apart on my tongue, my fingers, my cock, until you're nothing but a trembling mess begging for more."

"Sweet dreams, starling,"

Watching him like this—laughing, teasing, fully at ease—he was a completely different person from the cold, calculating immortal I knew in Voldaris. Here, surrounded by family, he was simply Xül.

As I drifted toward sleep, I found myself hoping that Xül would bring me here again someday—to this place where, for a brief moment, we could both pretend we were something other than what fate had made us.

"It must be difficult," I said softly. "Having a foot in both worlds." "Only because I can’t seem to find the strength to give one up," he replied with a wry smile.

"I see you, Xül," I whispered, unable to retreat now that I'd come this far. “I know you do, Thais.” He turned his head towards me, his shoulder tapping mine. “It’s the only reason I trust you with all of this. With them.”

Why are you making me feel these things that I shouldn’t? Why, Xül?” I tried to steady my voice.

"This thing between us. Tell me it's just in my head, and I'll never speak of it again."

"It's not just in your head," he admitted, the words sounding as if they'd been dragged from him against his will. "But that doesn't make it wise, or right, or possible."

"I want you." "Stop," he commanded, though he leaned into my touch. "Do you really want me to?" I whispered, moving closer despite the precarious rocking of the boat. "You're almost there, Thais," he warned. "You're going to drive me so far that I forget every rule, every duty, every reason why I should keep my hands to myself." "Good," I breathed. “You don’t understand, Thais.” His eyes burned into mine. "This can never just be physical for me," he said. "Not with you. And you deserve so much more than half of a man promised to someone else."

“You couldn’t even stand to be in the same room when another man expressed interest in me.” Xül’s jaw ticked. “Because none of them deserve you. No one ever will,” he nearly growled against my ear. “Even me, Thais. Especially me.”

“I don’t care that you’re engaged. I know you don’t care for her. I know she only wants what you can provide for her.” “That’s not the only problem, Thais. I don’t just want your body. I want all of you. Every single piec...

"There are things about me that you don't know," he said, his voice nearly cracking. "Things that could make you change your mind. I might be a selfish bastard, but I'm not that selfish. Not with you." Xül might have had his secrets, but I had my own. And I didn’t intend on sharing them either. At least for now. Secrets were something I could live with.

All trace of laughter vanished as our eyes met, suspended in the dark water beneath a canopy of stars.

"Fuck it,"

Every touch, every shared glance, every moment of tension between us had been leading to this—this inevitable collision of wills and want and need.

"Whatever this is, whatever it costs, I want it," I whispered against his lips, the words a vow I couldn't take back.

His hands moved to cup my face, his eyes searching min...

"I've never been more certain of anything."

How could I explain what this meant? That after months of fighting to survive, of learning to kill, of hardening myself against the world, I wanted nothing more than to surrender to him.

"Here?" I asked, surprised by his boldness. "I can't wait another bloody moment," he growled. His mouth found my neck, pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses to the sensitive skin there. "You taste like starlight and sin,"

"I've known pleasures both divine and profane. But never—" he said, while his thumb began a maddening circle around my clit. "Never have I wanted anyone the way I want you."

"Now," he said, his voice a dark promise that made me shiver with anticipation. “Are you ready for me to ruin this perfect body until you're addicted to the way I make you feel?”

"If we do this," he conceded, his voice dropping to that dangerous whisper again, "I won't be gentle. I won't treat you like some fragile flower. I'll take you exactly how I want you—hard, demanding, unrelenting. Do you understand?"

"Luckily for you, I don't want gentle."

"Maybe I want to be devoured," I said. His eyes darkened further. "Careful what you wish for, starling."

Before I could formulate a response, his mouth crashed down on mine, any pretense of gentleness abandoned. This was no careful exploration, this was possession, pure and primal.

he looked like something carved from shadow and flame—beautiful and terrible and utterly overwhelming.

"My own personal army," he murmured, breaking through my thoughts, watching as one of the spectral hands traced the curve of my hip. "Ready to hold you down while I have my way with you."

“I fear you enjoy this too much,” he observed. "Being restrained."

me completely at his mercy, exactly as he'd promised.

"Look at you," he growled, his voice strained. "Do you know what you look like right now, starling? When you’re taking my cock so well?" His hand came down on my ass with a sharp crack that sent shock waves through me. Another moan I couldn’t suppress. “You look like you’re mine.”

"Say it," he demanded. "Say you're mine." "Yours," I gasped. The last of my resistance crumbled. Not conquered, but willingly demolished.

"Good girl,"

"I was worried," he admitted, so softly I almost didn't hear it. I turned my head to look at him. "About what?" "That I went too far. That I was too rough." A muscle ticked in his jaw. "That I revealed too much of me." "And what are you, truly?" I asked. Now his eyes did meet mine, vulnerability laid bare in their depths. "Selfish. Possessive." I considered his words. "I'm not afraid of that," I told him. "I'm afraid of your walls."

"Only you would face down a god of death at his most unhinged and complain about his emotional unavailability."

"There you are,"

"I've spent so long being what others needed me to be," he said quietly. "What my father needed. What the domain needed. Sometimes I forget who I am without all of that."

I lay there trembling. I’d always equated control with safety, surrender with weakness. But this—giving him everything, letting him orchestrate my pleasure, my pain, my very breath… It was a strength I didn’t know existed within me. Perhaps it took more courage to let go than to hold on. And I knew, with bone-deep certainty, that I would never want anything else.

Be waiting for me tonight. In my bed."