His son was before him, and he did not know him. I am unknowable.
Adam wasn't raised being known and therefore hasn't experienced love and so he doesn't understand it properly or see himself as deserving of it. He makes himself unknowable because he doesn't think that he deserves to be seen, understood or loved. He has people who want to know and love him but he has to let them.
'In a low, unfamiliar voice, he said, [...] “The bruises he'd come to school with. Who has he ever had to love him? Ever?”' [TDT]
'Now he could see that it wasn’t charity Gansey was offering. It was just truth.'
