Every Bitter Thing Is Sweet: Tasting the Goodness of God in All Things

by Sara Hagerty

Like most pain, until you have known it for yourself, you are blind to it.

My question was not, Is God good? But instead, Is He good to me?

God was big enough for me to pattern my time into telling others about Him, but not real enough for me to find any delight in Him.

I decided that the love that stories stirred in me didn’t contribute to my goal of being a passionate pursuer of God. So I dropped them. Sure, I kept reading and filling my bookshelves, but I limited myself only to practical books I thought would grow my faith. Good and rich books, but not the stories that once drew me in and painted pictures on my mind. This was a reflection of the shift my life was taking: Less time getting lost in story, more time zeroing in on what I might produce.

Even a negative result is an indicator that hope is still alive.

My motherhood wasn’t the source of my discomfort, and my children weren’t its cause. My heart was detached.

If my chief end as a mother is anything less than knowing Him and carrying His glory in my life, I will walk through these years empty.