Darkdawn (The Nevernight Chronicle, #3)

by Jay Kristoff

Well, here we are again, gentlefriend. I think perhaps an apology is in order. Both for the conclusion of the second part of Mia’s tale, and for the state I left you in afterward. You seemed quite upset. Be assured there will be no cliff-hangers in this, our final dance together. As promised, her birth you’ve witnessed, her life you’ve lived. All that remains is her death. But before the smut and butchery begin in earnest, allow me one final refresher for those with memories as reliable as your narrator. And then we can get on with killing our murderous little bitch, yes?

He presided over the execution of Mia’s father, sentenced his lover, Mia’s mother, to die in the Philosopher’s Stone, stole Mia’s baby brother, and ordered Mia drowned in a canal, despite knowing she was his daughter. The word “cunt” doesn’t really seem to do him justice.

When all is blood, blood is all. —MOTTO OF THE FAMILIA CORVERE

“I know who Mia Corvere is,” Drusilla snapped. “This is a girl who gave up any chance at a normal life or happiness to see her parents avenged. She sold herself into slavery on a gambit that even a lunatic would consider insanity, for a single chance to strike down the men who destroyed her house. She is fearless. Reckless beyond reckoning. So if there is one thing I’ve learned about your little Crow, it is this: there is nothing that girl will not do for her familia. Nothing.”

“Nevernight,” he muttered. “Stupid name for a book.” “Makes for interesting reading,” Aelius said.

“It has footnotes? What kind of wanker writes a novel with footnotes?”

Hahaha

he opened the second’s cover and peered at the title. “Godsgrave,” he muttered. “Follows on from the first,” Aelius nodded. “I think I liked this one better, actually. Less fucking about at the start.”

“Our familia had a saying,” Mia said. “Before your father destroyed it. Neh diis lus’a, lus diis’a. Do you know what that means?” “I do not speak Liisian,” the boy growled. “When all is blood, blood is all.” She held out her hand again. “Blood is all, little brother,” she repeated. Jonnen looked up at her. In the dark, among those beautiful howling faces and open hands and the ghostly gravebone light, Mia could see the reflection of his father in those bottomless black eyes. But in the end, he took her hand.

“THE MANY WERE ONE,” Tric replied. “AND WILL BE AGAIN; ONE BENEATH THE THREE, TO RAISE THE FOUR, FREE THE FIRST, BLIND THE SECOND AND THE THIRD.”

BUT SHE HAS DONE WHAT SHE CAN TO SET YOU ON YOUR PATH. SHE SENT YOU SALVATION AS A CHILD THROUGH MERCURIO. SHE SENT YOU CLEO’S JOURNAL THROUGH AELIUS. SHE SENT YOU THE MAP THROUGH…” Tric’s eyes flashed as he glanced at Ashlinn. “… HER. SHE SENT YOU ME. YOU CAN’T IMAGINE THE STRUGGLE IT TOOK TO INFLUENCE THIS WORLD FROM WITHIN THE WALLS OF HER PRISON. BUT STILL, IN WHAT TINY WAY SHE CAN, SHE’S GIVEN YOU ALL THE AID SHE MAY.”

AND WHERE HIS SON’S BODY LAY IN THE WEST, AA COMMANDED HIS FAITHFUL TO BUILD A TEMPLE TO HIS GLORY. THAT TEMPLE BECAME A CITY, AND THAT CITY BECAME THE NEW HEART OF HIS FAITH.” “The Ribs.” Ash glanced at the gravebone blade at her waist. “The Spine.” “This whole place…,” Mia realized, looking around them. Tric nodded. “A GOD’S GRAVE.”

“YOU MUST MAKE WHOLE WHAT WAS BROKEN, MIA. YOU MUST RETURN MAGIK TO THE WORLD. RESTORE THE BALANCE BETWEEN NIGHT AND DAY, LIKE IT WAS IN THE BEGINNING. LIKE IT WAS ALWAYS MEANT TO BE. ONE SUN. ONE NIGHT. ONE MOON.”

“Tric,” Mia said. “Do you remember that time we were acolytes and you talked me out of doing something I desperately wanted by appealing to my sensible side?” The boy tilted his head. “… NO.” “Me either,” Mia replied. “Now show me the way. Or get the fuck out of it.”

“Sometimes the past won’t just die. Sometimes you have to kill it.”

“The same way I just laid c-claim to a throne.” Scaeva twisted the Trinity this way and that, veins standing taut in his neck, hissing through gritted teeth. “A matter of will, daughter m-mine. To claim true power, you need not soldiers … n-nor senators, nor servants of the holy. All you need is the will to do what others will n-not.”

“It is good to see you, Mia. You’ve grown into quite an astonishing young lady.” “Go fuck yourself, you unspeakable cunt.” Scaeva smiled faintly. “An astonishing young woman, then.”

“Because of me, you are solid steel. A blade sharp enough to cut the sunslight in six. And still you find it within yourself to hate me.” Scaeva gave a soft, bitter chuckle as he looked her in the eye. “All you are? All you have become? I gave you. Mine is the seed that planted you. Mine are the hands that forged you. Mine is the blood that flows, cold as ice and black as pitch, in those veins of yours.”

As dark and beautiful and deadly as the night.

Father is another name for God in a child’s eyes. And Mother is the very earth beneath her feet.

“Never flinch. Never fear. And never, ever forget.”

Could it be your dear wife Liviana isn’t the one who can’t have any more children?” Dark eyes glanced below his waist. “Getting soft in your old age?”

“Fear has its uses,” he replied. “Fear is what keeps the dark from devouring you. Fear is what stops you joining a game you cannot hope to win.”

careful, neh?” Mia warned. Ash smiled lopsided, leaned over, and kissed Mia’s lips. “You know what they say. What doesn’t kill me had better fucking run.”

Be advised now that the pages in your hands speak of a girl who was to murder as maestros are to music. Who did to happy ever afters what a sawblade does to skin. She’s dead herself, now—words both the wicked and the just would give an eyeteeth smile to hear. A republic in ashes behind her. A city of bridges and bones laid at the bottom of the—’”

Truth was, Mia was no different. She was no better. She wasn’t a hero, driven by the cruelty and injustice of the Republic. She was a killer, driven by the pure and burning desire for revenge. Scaeva and Duomo and Remus had hurt her, and so she’d set out to hurt them back. And if others got in her way on the journey, one way or another, she moved them out of her way. Ashlinn had simply done the same.

“Fuck,” Sidonius breathed. “Shit,” Ashlinn whispered. “Aye,” Butcher agreed. “Fuckshit.” Jonnen glanced about in disbelief. “You all have filthy mouths…”

But taking a beating is part of being alive. And let me tell you something, Mia—the best brawlers I ever met were the ugliest, too. Broken noses and missing teeth and cauliflower ears. Because the best way to learn to win is by losing.”

“Pretty warriors can’t fight for shit. You can’t know how sweet it is to breathe ’til you’ve had your ribs broken. You can’t appreciate being happy ’til someone has made you cry. And there’s no point blaming yourself for the kickings life gives you. Just think about how much it hurt, and how much you don’t want to feel that way again. And that’ll help you do what you need to do the next time to win.”

“I give no fucks for whose cock you got spat from. I’m not leaving you.”

“TO LIVE IN THE HEARTS WE LEAVE BEHIND IS TO NEVER DIE,”

Out in the dark, a bookworm roared again. Closer this time. Aelius drew long and deep on his cigarillo, embers sparking in his eyes, his fingers stained with ink. “Don’t fuck with librarians, young lady. We know the power of words.”

My name is Mia Corvere,” she said, still unblinking. “Blade of the Red Church. Champion of the Venatus Magni. Chosen of the Dark Mother and Queen of Scoundrels. Never call me girl again.”

“I am a daughter of the dark between the stars,” she replied. “I am the thought that wakes the bastards of this world sweating in the nevernight. I am the vengeance of every orphaned daughter, every murdered mother, every bastard son.” Mia leaned forward and looked the man in the eye. “I am the war you cannot win.”

“I DENIED DEATH FOR YOU,” he breathed, leaning closer still. “AND I’D DIE FOR YOU AGAIN. KILL FOR YOU. I’D TEAR THE STARS DOWN FROM THE HEAVENS TO FASHION YOU A CROWN. YOU ARE MY HEART. MY QUEEN. I’D DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING YOU ASK ME, MIA.”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry things turned out the way they did. I’m sorry we don’t all get what we want. Because I want you, Tric, Goddess help me, I do. But truth is, as much as I want to have you now, I want to keep her more.”

You’re going to kill him.” Mia looked up into her brother’s eyes. Ashlinn was dozing, head in Mia’s lap. Mia had been gently reweaving the girl’s warbraids, long golden locks entwined between her fingers. “I’m going to try,” Mia replied. “Why?” Jonnen asked. “Because he deserves it.” “Because he hurts people.” “Yes.” “Mia,” the boy said softly. “You hurt people, too.”

“I hurt people all the time. And that’s the riddle, little brother. How do you kill a monster without becoming one yourself?”

I’m not some hero in a storybook. I’m not someone you should aspire to be. I’m a ruthless cunt, Jonnen. I’m a selfish bitch. You hurt me, I’ll hurt you back. You hurt the ones I love, I’ll kill you instead. That’s just the way I am. Julius Scaeva killed our mother. The man I called Father. And I don’t care what they did to deserve it. I don’t care that they weren’t perfect. I don’t even care that they were probably just as bad as him. Because truth told, perhaps I’m worse than all of them. So fuck what’s right. And fuck redemption. Because Julius Scaeva still deserves to die.”

In the end I decided you’re just too dangerous to fuck about with. But I wanted you to know I killed you first because I respected you most. I thought you might draw some solace from that,

It all happened just as it was meant to. As he meant it to. That treacherous old son of a whore …

She’s meant for more than vengeance, that one. Always has been.”

“DON’T GIVE YOURSELF TO SORROW, MIA. DON’T LOSE THE HOPE INSIDE. MORE THAN ANYTHING YOU ARE, MORE THAN THE COURAGE, THE CUNNING, THE RAGE, YOU’RE THE GIRL WHO BELIEVED.

The Crown of the Moon. She almost smiled to see it. The final answer to the riddle of her life. The last revelation in a story written in ink and blood by the light of dusk and dawning. And in the end, after all the murder and all the miles, it was so simple. She could see the city of Godsgrave in her mind, as if from above—the Sword and Shield Arms, the Nethers, the towering, ossified Ribs. Shattered isles, run through with traceries of canals, looking for all the world like a giant laid upon its back. One piece missing.

You never know what can break you until you’re falling apart. You never miss your shadow until you’re lost in the dark.

Fear was a poison. Fear was a prison. Fear was the bridesmaid of regret, the butcher of ambition, the bleak forever between forward and backward. Fear was Can’t. Fear was Won’t. But fear wasn’t ever a choice. To never fear was to never hope. Never love. Never live. To never fear the dark was to never smile as the dawn kissed your face. To never fear solitude was to never know the joy of a beauty in your arms. Part of having is the fear of losing. Part of creating is the fear of it breaking. Part of beginning is the fear of your ending. Fear is never a choice. Never a choice. But letting it rule you is.

And it struck him in that moment just how much a part of him she was, just how much she meant, just how deeply she’d changed him, forever and always. This girl who’d dared where others had failed, who had never ever seen the world the way others did. Nor had he, really. Goddess, how he loved her … She smiled at him. Just for a heartbeat. Black eyes gleaming with tears she’d never allow to fall in a place like this. And it struck him then, just how much she loved him back.

You scat-loving fuckweasels, pull them in before I toss you over!”

I didn’t know we’d started taking orders from daemons, Cap’n!” “I didn’t know you’d traded in your balls for a vagina, either, but here we are!” “You know, I’ve never understood that!” BigJon called. “I mean, women squeeze babies out of those things, why are they considered—”

But to live in the hearts of those we leave behind is to never die. And to burn in the memories of our friends is to never say goodbye. So let me say this instead. Goodnight, gentlefriend. Goodnight. Never flinch. Never fear. And never, ever forget.