If It Makes You Happy

by Julie Olivia

“God, I’m so pissed at you,” she hisses. “Pissed at me?” “You like him!” I blink. “What are you talking—” “We didn’t do anything!” she whines, throwing a defeated hand in the air. “I lied. Because I needed to see you squirm for a teensy second.” She leans forward with her forearms on the table. “Shells, he talked about you all night. All. Night.” “No, he didn’t,” I breathe in disbelief. “Yes, he did.” “So, you didn’t kiss?” “Are you joking me?” she asks with a laugh. “He didn’t even look at my cleavage, which, for the record, is incredible. I put glitter on the girls.” I stifle a laugh. “He didn’t look at your sparkly boobs?” “He didn’t,” she says with a flat stare. She smacks my arm. “Cliff likes you, Shelly. What are you doing?” “I don’t understand the question.” “What. Are. You. Doing?” she says, enunciating every single word. “That man would jump off a bridge if you told him to, except, whoops, he’s already jumped, and he’s now