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My eyes are filling fast with tears and I blink and blink but the world is a mess and I want to laugh because all I can think is how horrible and beautiful it is, that our eyes blur the truth when we can’t bear to see it.
“Liar, liar, pants on fire,” Warner says softly.
“I am going to kill your father,” I say to him, “and I’m going to destroy The Reestablishment.” He’s still smiling. “I will.” “I know,” he says. “Then why are you laughing at me?” “I’m not,” he says softly. “I’m only wondering,” he says, “if you would like my help.”
“It’s not charity,” I snap. “He cares about me—and I care about him!” Warner nods, unimpressed. “You should get a dog, love. I hear they share much the same qualities.”
“Don’t worry.” He smiles. “I cut some holes in it for you.” “You’re so thoughtful,” I snap. “It was thoughtful,” I hear Delalieu say.
“Juliette,” Warner says, and I nearly fall into the toilet. “Come out here, love. It’s rude to eavesdrop.”
“Look straight ahead,” he whispers. “It won’t do us any good for you to be caught talking to invisible people.”
Kenji pulls up beside me, his face splitting into a huge smile. He slips his arm around my shoulder. Squeezes. Says, “Lookie what I found.”
“I bet you wouldn’t think it was gross if it was you.”
Adam goes rigid with alarm. “What are you talking about? She’s not going anywhere with you.” Warner scratches the back of his head. “Do you never get exhausted being so wholly unbearable? You have as much charisma as the rotting innards of unidentified roadkill.”
“Is there something you want to say?” Adam turns on him. “God, no,” Warner says. “Juliette doesn’t require my assistance. And you might not have realized it yet, but it’s obvious to everyone else that you’ve lost this fight, Kent.”
Our soaps were harsh and smelled strange and were fairly ineffective. Kenji used to bring them into our training sessions and break off pieces to pelt at me when I wasn’t focusing.
Do not damage any of my equipment. Leave things the way you found them. And if you do not shower on a regular basis, do not come within ten feet of me.”
“It’s weird, isn’t it?” he says. “What is?” “If we were naked right now, I’d be dead.”
“Oh really?” I say. “Nicknames are flattering, huh?” He nods. “Then how about I call you Kenny?” Kenji crosses his arms. Stares me down. “That’s not even a little bit funny.”
“Hey, don’t you need to shower?” I ask him. “So now you’re telling me I smell.”
And yeah, Adam is a good guy. He really is. But just because he’s a good guy doesn’t make him the right guy for me.”
“I am going to MURDER YOU—” “No,” he says, pointing at me as he shifts backward again. “Bad Juliette. You don’t like to kill people, remember? You’re against that, remember? You like to talk about feelings and rainbows—
“Why do you call her ‘love’?” James asks. “I’ve heard you say that before, too. A lot. Are you in love with her? I think Adam’s in love with her. Kenji’s not in love with her, though. I already asked him.”
He shifts, all at once, slipping out from under me, and gives me a small shove to move me over. I fall face-first into Warner’s lap. I hear Warner’s brief, sharp intake of breath, and I scramble upright, blushing so hard, and I’m suddenly so relieved no one can see me right now.
“You’ve known him for how long, exactly? Five months? And you think you know him so well? Maybe he’s in a secret jazz club where he sings a cappella and wears sparkly vests and thinks it’s cool to do the cancan.”
“We’re too different now. We want different things. And this?” I say, nodding at our hands. “All this managed to prove is that you are extremely good at turning me off.”
“I love you,” I whisper. “I love you exactly as you are.”
I touch the tip of my finger to his lips. “There are secrets in here,” I say. “I want them out.”
Warner’s hand is on my back. He leans in, whispers, “How easy is it to take this thing off?”
You brought me back to life.”
He leans into my ear. Lowers his voice. “Ignite, my love. Ignite.”
“You will go on to greatness,” he whispers. “I have never deserved you.”
“You are my friend,” I tell him. “But not your best friend. Kenji is your best friend.” I try so hard not to laugh at the jealousy in his voice. “Yes, but you’re my favorite friend.”
“Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, J, but I am not Bruce Lee.” “Who’s Bruce Lee?” “Who’s Bruce Lee?” Kenji asks, horrified. “Oh my God. We can’t even be friends anymore.” “Why? Was he a friend of yours?” “You know what,” he says, “just stop. Just—I can’t even talk to you right now.”
And shoot him in the forehead. SEVENTY-FOUR Twice. Once for Adam. Once for Warner.
