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For better or worse, my sister was my other half. She was my rock, even if I wasn’t hers. Maybe I was her wind—something that blew in and out as it pleased and made messes. But every once in a while, maybe I pushed something in the right direction. Or perhaps that was just wishful thinking.
I was still scared of the disappointment, but I had to know. I had to be brave enough to face the outcome—whatever it was. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel…hopeful, and that was dangerous. Hope is one of those things that can be crushed in an instant. It terrified me. I just…I felt good.