No, You Hang Up

by A.J. Merlin

“There was someone else talking first, right? Someone a lot less irritating than you?” God, I should hang up. I really need to hang up. “Where’d you go, other friend?” Fuck. He’s talking to me.

“There’s the little rabbit.

“As fun as it is to hear your angry voice, little rabbit…”

“I think you want attention,” the man goes on, like I hadn’t been trying to dismiss this or explain my actions away. “Is that it, little rabbit? You’re looking for the kind of attention your friends won’t give you?” “No.” I force my words to remain flat. “Honestly? I’m just looking to go to bed soon.” “Well, that’s pretty disappointing. And I don’t believe you. I’ll give you the attention you’re looking for⁠—” “Yeah, I’ll be hanging up now⁠—” “All you have to do is wait for me.”

I’m not afraid of the dark. Not really. But I think every human has some fear of the shadows, deep down. After all, aren’t we all afraid of the things we can’t see?

Black jeans, a black sweatshirt. A black hood pulled up over dark hair and a face obscured by a shiny black mask, suddenly lit by a garish grin of glowing red lines.

“Come on, Kaira. Let’s play the game you were too afraid to continue on the phone. Only, I think I’d like to make a few modifications for my benefit. I hope you don’t mind. I’m just”—he tilts his head again, and I think the move would be endearing on someone other than a masked probable-murderer—“selfish that way.”

“You’re a deliciously feisty thing, aren’t you?”

He’s…joking. He’s literally making jokes right now, and even though I shouldn’t, I want to cackle at the stupidity of his words.

“Yeah, little bunny, I’ve got a little extra going on up there.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean? Why would I go to all the trouble of coming here and making sure you can’t call for help if I’m just going to kill you?”

“Huxley,” he interrupts, and for a moment I have no idea what he’s said. “And yeah, Kai, I heard you. But if you’re going to call me anything, you can use my name.”

“How is my karma this bad, huh?” I’m still talking to myself. “Fucked over as a kid, and now the state’s most prepared serial killer is in my house. Damn it!”

“Yeah, you can bite me like that if you want, Kai.” He chuckles,

“Have you looked at yourself, Kai?” His grin is almost rueful. “You’re just so murder-able. And, let’s not forget, so fuckable.”

“You don’t want to admit it, but I think I’m growing on you.” “Like a cyst,” I manage to say.

“Want me to be your wolf, little bunny? I’ll gladly close my jaws around this pretty throat and remind you that you’re prey. Oh, fuck—” He thrusts hard into me again. “We’re into some dark shit, aren’t we, Kai?”

“You little fucked up thing. Drugged out of your mind and you still want this. You want me to be your predator. To ruin you, to tear out your throat with my teeth.” He leans down to click his teeth together near my face. “That’s it. Your greedy pussy grips me so good when I do that.”

I’m not sorry about the mess. See you soon, little bunny P.S. I’ll kill your neighbor if she knocks on your damn door one more time. P.P.S. Mi-da-zo-lam

“Nah. You don’t hate me. You’re afraid of me, Kai. But you don’t hate me.”

“No, you hang up. Hang up, Kai, or you’ll get to listen to me moan your name and wish I could sink into that soft, greedy little pussy.

I’m not lonely, I tell myself. I’m just alone, which is a completely different thing.

“Dear God. If this is a test and Patrice is back here without her life alert bracelet after having a fall…you should pick a stronger soldier,”

“Yes, little bunny. Don’t you dare scream, because as much as I love your wit and self-pep talks…I won’t go to jail for you. Run away, little bunny. But don’t you dare make a sound.”

“I can still scream without a tongue.” “Then I’ll slit your vocal chords and fuck your mouth while you bleed out in the grass.”

“Sorry, pretty girl. I get a little carried away, sometimes.”

“This is new for me, you know? Playing with someone without the intention of…” he trails off pointedly,

“Because I’m a paramedic, and I know my way around sedatives.” That brings me up short. I stop tripping around my living room, instead staring at him with a perplexed expression that causes him to stop as well. “What?” Hux asks, confusion in his voice. “Paramedic?” I repeat. “Like, an EMT? Like, rides in an ambulance, saving people?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” God, he seems so proud of himself, and I know I’m going to hate the answer. “No matter what you do, anytime you let another guy fuck you, they’ll see it. They’ll have to touch it. You can lie, or cover it, or tell them whatever you want. But you’ll know. And I’ll know.”

“You’ll know I marked you here, and that you’re mine. No matter who else fucks you, you’ll always be mine.”

“Fuck, I think you get off on this, don’t you, little bunny? You like the idea of me being rough with you. Do the other boys you’ve fucked know that?”

“Yes, I like it when you talk to me like that. I get off on you being rough, on you being mean, on being you.”

“I’m nowhere near the worst. For you, anyway.”

“So good for me, you know that? Fuck, maybe God finally loves me for something, or I’ve pleased the devil enough for him to have sent you to me. You were made for me, weren’t you? Made to be fucked like I own you.”

“This is probably a good time to tell you I’ll be coming inside your pussy again. I love watching it leak out of you.

“Such a good girl for me. So perfect. So fucked up.”

“Don’t kid yourself, Kai. You’re probably just as fucked up as me.”

“I’ll leave you alone. That’s what you want, right?” But he doesn’t give me a chance to respond. He just reaches out, his fingers coming close to my face before dropping,

All I can do is watch him go while I try to figure out what I’m supposed to say or do. Or feel.

Huxley can see me.

Huxley is in this bar.

“Will you make it up to me if I let him go?”

“If I send your pretty blond here on his way”—he shakes Eric by his shirt like he’s a terrier shaking a rat, and Eric would fall if Hux were to let go—“will you spend the night convincing me I didn’t make the wrong choice? The boring choice?”

Murder isn’t sexy, I tell myself.

“You said this was over,” I remind him, and I hate the way it almost sounds like I’m whining. “Because you don’t want me,” he retorts,

“I’d really rather bruise that lovely throat with my fingers and my teeth, but you’ve given me such a convenient toy tonight,”

“I like you both ways, you know,” he adds casually, his other hand coming down to cradle my jaw. “I love it when you’re such a fighter. You’re just so fucking stubborn and it’s perfect. But I love this, too. This sweet side of you that just wants to be my good girl.”

“Right there,” he coos. “That’s where you belong. I miss your mouth, pretty girl. Come on. You can’t tell me you don’t miss my cock.”

“No, you don’t even get to look at her. If you do, I’ll cut out your eyes and feed them to you, little boy.”

“Find someone who can teach you to be less of a disappointment, hmm?”