Make Your Change (Aston Archers Hockey, #4)

by Cali Melle

And as I study Matteo through the mirror, it’s clear to see there was never any denying of who his father is. I’ve known it all along, but after comparing the two of them side by side, it’s as plain as day. Matteo is Carson Ford’s son.

“Please let me be in his life. I don’t care what I have to do to make that happen, but please don’t keep him from me any longer.”

“We can’t go back, we can’t change anything that has happened. All we can do is move forward and not repeat the mistakes of our past.”

Even if it’s temporary, I don’t see this being as easy as co-parenting . . . especially when he keeps looking at me like he has a little secret he’s keeping from me. And fuck me for wanting to know what it is.

“What if I told you I want you to disrupt my life?” His eyes find mine. “You aren’t bothering me, Trouble. My time belongs to the two of you.”

“You make me uneasy in a way that feels as though my heart is going to burst through my chest. In a way that feels like my brain can’t remember how to function properly. Like I don’t know how to regulate my breathing.” The corners of his mouth twitch, his hand shifting away from mine. “So, yeah. You make me uneasy in the best way possible, Trouble.”

“You’re just supposed to be the mother of my child . . . but when I look at you, it doesn’t feel like that.” He directs his attention to his hands in his lap. “It feels like more and honestly, it scares the shit out of me.” “Why does it scare you?” He turns to look at me, his eyes immediately meeting mine. “Because for the first time, it feels like I might have something to lose.”

“I’d be lying if I didn’t say that you’re quickly becoming one of my favorite people on this stupid spinning rock in space.”

“I want you in my space. I want you and Matteo here when I wake up in the morning and I want you both here when I go to sleep at night.” I pause, a smirk pulling on my lips. “And I want you in my fucking bed, not in the room across the hall.”

If there’s one thing I’ve learned about Carson Ford, it’s that he does things intentionally and he means the things he says. He wouldn’t have made that space if he didn’t want me to occupy it.

“You ever feel like you’re standing in your own life, and somehow you're still too far away to touch it?”

And I hope—with the quiet, aching hope that only the broken carry—that he will never end up sitting where I am right now. Wishing he could go back and love her louder.

her get away. I let her walk away once before, under different circumstances, and fuck that. I’m not letting her walk away again.