The Fruitful Life

by Jerry Bridges

The faithful person is not only honest and dependable but also loyal.

There is perhaps no greater description of loyalty than Solomon’s words, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity” (Proverbs 17:17).

Whether it be in honesty or dependability or loyalty, faithfulness is frequently a costly virtue. Only the Holy Spirit can enable us to pay that price.

Proverbs tells us, “The kisses of an enemy may be profuse, but faithful are the wounds of a friend” (Proverbs 27:6). Only the truly faithful friend cares enough about you or me to undertake the often thankless task of pointing out where we are wrong.

As with the other graces of Christian character, the first step in growing in faithfulness is to acknowledge the biblical standard.

Both gentleness and meekness are born of power, not weakness. There is a pseudo-gentleness that is timidity, and there is a pseudo-meekness that is cowardly.

A profile of gentleness as it should appear in our lives will first include actively seeking to make others feel at ease, or “restful,” in our presence.

We should also avoid displaying our commitment to Christian discipleship in such a way as to make others feel guilty, taking care not to break the bruised reed of the hurting Christian or snuff out the smoldering wick of the immature Christian.

Second, gentleness will demonstrate respect for the personal dignity of the other person. Where necessary, it will seek to change a wrong opinion or attitude by persuasion and kindness, not by domination or intimidation.

Gentleness will also avoid blunt speech and an abrupt manner, instead seeking to answer everyone with sensitivity and respect, ready to show consideration toward all.

Gentle Christians will not feel threatened by opposition or resent those who oppose them. Instead, they will seek to gently instruct, looking to God to dissolve the opposition, just as Paul taught Timothy to do in chapter 2 of his second letter.

Finally, gentle Christians will not degrade or belittle or gossip about the brother or sister who falls into some sin. Instead they will grieve for him or her and pray for that person’s repentance.

First we must decide that this is a trait we really do want to develop.

Second, we can ask those who know us best and will be honest how we come across to other people.

As we face our overall need, we should also ask the Holy Spirit to make us aware of specific situations in which we fail to act with gentleness or considerateness. It is not enough to concede in a vague sort of way that we may be lacking in this godly virtue.

Self-control is control of one’s self. It is probably best defined as the governing of one’s desires. D. G. Kehl describes it as “the ability to avoid excesses, to stay within reasonable bounds.”[2] Bethune calls it “the healthful regulation of our desires and appetites, preventing their excess.”[3] Both of these descriptions imply what we all know to be true; we have a tendency to overindulge our various appetites and consequently need to restrain them.

Self-control is necessary because we are at war with our own sinful desires.

Sound judgment enables us to determine what we should do and how we should respond; inner strength provides the will to do it. Both sound judgment and inner strength are thus necessary for Spirit-directed self-control.

Self-control of the body should be aimed primarily at three areas of physical temptation: gluttony (in both food and drink), laziness, and sexual immorality or impurity.

He knew the importance of getting that time of fellowship with His Father, and He disciplined His physical body in order to do it.

If acts of immorality are becoming a problem among Christians, the thoughts of immorality are a much greater problem.

It is in our thought life that our emotions and actions begin, and that sinful desires plant their roots and entice us into sin.

The gates to our thought lives are primarily our eyes and our ears. What we see or read or hear largely determines what we think.

Guarding our hearts begins with guarding our eyes and ears.

We allow in our minds what we would not allow in our actions, because other people cannot see our thoughts. But God sees them. David said, “You perceive my thoughts from afar,” and “Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord” (Psalm 139:2,4). The Christian who fears God, controls his thoughts — not because of what other people think, but because of what God thinks.

Augustine asked. ‘Then let thy spirit obey thy God. Thou must be governed, that thou may’st govern.’”

The more we say no to sinful desires, the more we will be able to say no. But to experience this, we must persevere through many failures.

Increase in godlikeness is directly tied to increase in our devotion to God.

David prayed, “give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name” (Psalm 86:11).

If we are committed to the practice of godliness, our prayer life will reflect it. We will be regularly asking God to increase our fear of Him, to deepen our understanding of His love for us, and to heighten our desire for His fellowship.

Before beginning my Bible reading for the day, I take a few minutes to reflect upon one of the attributes of God or to meditate upon one of the passages about Him mentioned above, and then ascribe to Him the glory and honor due to Him because of that particular attribute.

But the primary objective of our quiet time should be fellowship with God — developing a personal relationship with Him and growing in our devotion to Him.