The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant (Fred, the Vampire Accountant, #1)

by Drew Hayes

placed a travel mug of blood into the cup holder

Magically nonclotting blood

“Are you telling me that vampires and werewolves are the reason America won the Revolutionary War?” I asked, dumbfounded. “No, I’m saying America somehow managed to pull it out thanks to the French,” Krystal scoffed. There was a beat of silence, then Albert said: “You know, when you think about it, her version makes a lot more sense.”

these men looked as though trouble would be sleeping with the light on for a week and double bolting its doors after even a brief encounter with them.