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I doubt men twice my age looking at me is a proxy for anything other than them wanting to take advantage.
“And you and the truth are particularly tight?” He assesses me for a beat. “I’m not going to lie to you, Serena.” “Well, I’m probably going to lie to you a lot.”
“You’re my closest friend’s husb—mate’s closest friend. And I’d love to get along with you. So maybe we could be, you know, friends.” “What about polite acquaintances?” he counters. I cannot tell whether he’s serious, so I nod. “Deal. And you may quietly pine after me, if you must.”
“Serena, you’re a half-Human Were who admits to being a serial liar, doesn’t know how electricity works, and is undoubtedly swimming in complex PTSD. Believe me, a toddler can say it.”
She expects little and is not easily offended. It makes pushing her away frustratingly hard.
“Maybe there was permanent damage. That would explain it.” “Explain what?” “The many things that are wrong with you.”
“And I’m not going to say that I can fend off whoever comes for me. However, if I know about a threat, I can prepare and take care of myself—” “I will take care of you,” he says roughly. Oh. “Oh.”
“Oh.” Koen just killed someone without batting an eye but cannot take me shedding a single teardrop.
“I’m okay, I promise. I’m just tired.” “Then go the fuck to sleep,” he orders, panicky. Big Bad Murderous Wolf in Charge of Thousands Cannot Handle Girl Crying. What a headline. “What are you waiting for? Do you need a bedtime story?”
“I think you owe me an apology.” “For what?” “The way you stared at my tits.” Silence. Then, instead of the I’m sorry or Go to fucking sleep I expect, he says, “I think you owe me an apology.” “For what?” “How spectacular your tits are.”
“But,” Lowe continues, “if Serena’s sister is willing to acknowledge that a lot of good can come from this, then you, too, should—” “I fucking won’t.” “That bad?” Lowe asks after a long silence. No. It’s worse than that.
Do you trust anyone at all? With your precious life, killer? How could I?
I can’t believe I’m getting internationally dragged for refusing to screw a guy who told me that I looked just like his mother.
“I’m not afraid of your animals. Send them after me, and see what—” “Whoa. Highly offensive. Whatever have I done to make you think that I wouldn’t kill you myself?”
We do have sandwiches for dinner, but Koen’s the one who ends up making them, with a little help from Ana.
“She’s fine,” Koen orders, returning to the room with something in his hand. “Stop fussing.” It’s an odd thing to say, considering that it’s followed by him kneeling in front of me and taking the heel of one of my feet in his palm. He runs a damp washcloth all over the little abrasions the forest floor left on my skin, the ones that are already starting to heal.
“You’re fine. Aren’t you, killer?” he asks, holding my eyes.
“She’s an adult Were who doesn’t require coddling,” Koen interrupts. Once again, a bit jarring to hear, especially as he rolls thick, soft socks up my shins. They reach just below my knees.
“I’m simply going to lock you up, killer. If I have to chain you to my fucking bed to keep you alive, I will not hesitate.”
“If you keep lying to me, I can’t properly protect you. And if I can’t protect you, I won’t keep you around.” “I’m not— Which lie?” He snorts softly. “You tell that many?” “I…” I fidget with the sleeve of my hoodie. “I lie a lot.”
“Well, that’s too bad. Because I don’t want you to feel safe.” “You…don’t?” Glaring, he leans toward me, full of something vicious that I cannot name. “I want you to be scared shitless, Serena. I want you so fucking terrified of me, you won’t even dream of not doing what I say. I want you to feel like your soft little throat is in my hands, and I want you to be so afraid that I’ll tear into it that when I tell you to do something for your own fucking safety, you won’t consider saying anything but ‘Yes, Alpha.’ ”
Even Owen, Misery’s twin, was less like a demonic scion of darkness and more of a lost, indolent fuckboy with daddy issues.
owen book 3 ????
So nice, to discover that the dude who’d told me I was his mate was impalement happy.
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And…you know how the first week you were here, I kind of asked you out? I do. In my dreams, I violently slammed my skull against the wall. You said no. And it’s totally fine. But would it be possible for you to…A deep breath. Never, ever, ever mention it to Koen?
“Sadly, not all of us can be named after the literal state of being in agony,” Misery says.
“We could be related. I could be your cousin.” He scoffs, unimpressed. “You’re not.” “How do you know?” “I have a cousin. Looking at her does not feel like looking at you.”
“There are three things I believe with utmost certainty. Death will come for all of us. No matter what, the sun will rise every morning. And Koen is never, ever going to touch you. Not even if you beg him for it on your knees.”
Cute, how she thinks he’d ever let her out of his sight.
Koen frowns. “I want a kiss on the cheek.” “You can’t change your mind after you pick—that’s the whole point of the game. And the kiss wasn’t even an option for you.” “Bullshit. I want both options.”
Look at her. Just—look at her.
Because every single thing I glanced at, grazed, examined, eyed, or even considered when we were at the grocery store, every single thing I decided to walk past, every single thing I told myself I didn’t need—every single thing has somehow made it here, inside Koen’s house.
“It’s a Human thing,” Colin explains to every newcomer. “They have cloacas.”
“Since you’re so sure that everyone here despises her, including me, let this be known: fuck with my mate, and I’m going to kill you so slowly, draw it out so long, tectonic plates will move and create whole new mountain ranges. And when the rest of your family comes to avenge you, I’ll do the same to them. And if your friends come, I’m not going to fucking stop. Not even if all that’s left of the pack is me and her. I will paint this entire territory green before I let anyone in the pack spill a single drop of red. Okay?”
Since I can’t, I once again try to hoist myself onto the counter. Once again, his hands find my hips and settle me on the surface. This time, they linger.
“You did it. Look at you.” I grin wide, lift my eyes to meet his, and find that he’s already staring at me, black eyed and voracious. “Look at you,” he says. At least, I think so. I could have imagined it, because it’s little more than a whispered growl, quickly followed by a much lighter question. “Now what?” he asks.
“Serena, the Alpha of Northwest pack is traditionally asked to honor a celibacy covenant. He’s forbidden by law to engage in any kind of intimate relationships—emotional or physical.”
He told her that he would never touch her because he didn’t want her enough; in truth, he will never touch her because he wants her too much. The make-believe, he thinks, was kinder to both of them.
“Tuck that T-shirt in your pants. It’ll look less like it’s mine.”
He wants to show her every corner of his territory. The deep blue lakes and the snow-capped peaks. Moss-draped trees and rock spires. He wants to be with her for each marveled intake of breath.
“Could reports of his passing have been greatly exaggerated?” “I ripped his heart out of his chest, chewed it for half a minute, and then spit it into the ocean.” I nod slowly. “A simple ‘no’ would have sufficed.”
“Good. I need to meet with the Assembly.” His thumb swipes against my cheekbone. “Do you want to come with me?” Yes, with every single cell of my body. “Why would I come with you?” “Because the idea of having you out of my sight makes me want to flip those cars one by one.”
“Before I leave, I think I need to hold you for a minute.”
“No one ‘lets’ me do stuff or go places,” I point out tiredly. “That’s not how it works, Koen.” “If you were mine, it would. And clearly, you fucking should be.”
“After. What,” he repeats. He’s not on the stool anymore. Instead, his palms brace both sides of my bare thighs, and he leans into me. Close enough that his scent becomes my entire universe. Close enough for me to see little freckles on his skin, to count the scars that crisscross all over his torso. He looks down, inexorable, eyes blacker than black. “Say it. After what?”
The second the words are out, hanging heavy in the air between us, Koen…smiles. He bends further, and there isn’t a single trace of doubt on his face. He’s an immovable object and an unstoppable force. And he says, slowly, “If you think I’m going to let you die, Serena, you know fuck all.”
All I know is that my heart is squeezed into the tightest of fists. It’s obvious what he wants to be told.
“When I die—” “Not on my fucking watch, Serena.” “Okay. But when I die—” Koen’s fingers abruptly slide into the hair at the side of my head. Bend my neck back, none too gently. “Serena.” He stares down at me, eyes a few inches from mine. His fury is a physical, formidable thing. It doesn’t scare me. “If you say anything like that ever again, I’m going to kill you myself. Understood?”
“Anything that’s going to happen to you,” he promises, voice honest and pitched low in the swish of the breeze, “is going to be over my dead body.”
