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But for her, sex with me was a necessary evil she’d endure to get what she wanted: a baby.
“Can you please not be with any other women as long as we have to be intimate?”
“I know it’s a lot to ask—”
“Dammit, Sara,” I muttered, turning back around to her. I couldn’t fucking believe her. “That’s what you think of me? Yes? That I’ve been fucking other girls all this time?”
“We weren’t intimate…and I know you and Amo u...
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“Used t...
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I raised my finger with our w...
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“Before I put this on. Maybe our marriage is hardly that. Maybe it’s mostly for show, but my parents taught me to honor m...
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“Then everything’s settled. In two days, we’ll be intimate. Hopefully, you’ll get your baby so we won’t have to repeat it.”
She left the kitchen and headed for her room. Soon after, I heard retching and the flush of the toilet. I sagged against the kitchen counter and closed my eyes.
If the mere thought of sex with me already made her feel sick, trying to get her pregnant w...
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It was obvious he didn’t want to touch me again. I still remembered his disgusted expression in the cell afterward. Was it that? Did the idea of touching me again disgust him?
After a year of my silent retreat from him, Maximus must feel steamrolled by my sudden request.
“I hope you have a good reason to call. I’m currently writing a very satisfying murder scene,” she muttered in typical Isa style.
“Oh, I didn’t mean to disturb you. I can call—”
“Bull,” she interrupted m...
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“I can hear you’re upset. Do you need me ...
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“Maximus is a tough guy, but even tough guys have things they can’t brush off. That day probably still haunts him, so he might be anxious about taking the next step in your marriage.”
Hearing Isa confirm that I had ignored Maximus’s feelings made me feel horrible.
“And maybe it would be a good idea to work on your marriage first before y...
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“But do you really think you can go through with having sex with Maximus? You haven’t been intimate with him since that day. Maybe you should at least try to build up to sex. Kiss and fool around a bit. Learn to feel comfortable with his touch and enjoy your body again.”
“That’s why I’m glad we’re chatting on the phone. You’d laugh at how red my face
“Then you can’t know. Let me ask another question… what do you want? Apart from a baby.”
“I don’t know. I’m not sure I can ever be with him without being reminded of that day.”
“Not if you don’t try. You have to take action. Replace the bad memo...
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He looked up when I entered and gave me a tense smile before he returned his attention to the screen.
Even on good days, we hardly talked during our morning coffee, and today was far from good.
“You thought I didn’t listen to you.”
“I’m not someone who talks a lot, especially not with people I don’t know well.”
Ouch. I nodded. “If you don’t tell me anything, I won’t get to know you.”
“I’ll make sure I won’t die before I get you pregnant.” I flushed. “Just be careful. Always.”
“You won’t ever have to apologize to me, Sara.”
“Tonight?” He made it sound like we were waiting for our execution.
Isa was always good at distracting me with her dry, dark humor and I-don’t-give-a-shit attitude, but today, even her presence could hardly stop my brain from dreading tonight.
“We don’t have to do anything,” he murmured in his deep voice.
“I’m ovulating tonight.”
“You said that a...
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“I was going to kiss you and help you relax so it’s a good experience for you.”
“It won’t be. Please don’t draw it out. Can’t you just do it like last time?”
He pushed away and turned his back on me. His shoulde...
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“Like last time?” His voice shook...
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“I don’t mean it like that… I just mean…can you...
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He sounded absolutely mad. Was he angry that I made him do it? Maybe he really didn’t want kids, but my wish for them was simply too great to retreat.
“Can you do it now?” “I can. But it’ll hurt, Sara. I don’t think—” “Just do it.”
“I can’t. Just do it, dammit. You owe it to me!”
“I owe you more than that,” he said quietly, then he shifted and pushed into me. He was slow and careful.
“Fuck it!” he snarled. “I’m not doing this.”
I gripped his bicep, sinking my nails into his skin. “No. I’ll be silent. Just make me a baby.”
I could see him gather his clothes from the floor before he moved to the door.
I almost called out for him to stay but didn’t. I wasn’t sure I could bear his closeness now.
