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I know you’re supposed to believe your parents, trust what they’re saying, and I have. I’ve believed every word my dad has uttered since I learned what words meant, but now I’m not so sure anymore. I stopped believing in Santa when I was nine years old, and I feel like I’m gonna stop believing in my dad one day too. Maybe I already have.
I want to shove him away, but I need the embrace more than I need to be obstinate in this moment.
‘You should have been nice to me, Blake, because now you’re going to die.’”
Some dads have tea parties with their little girls—not mine, though. He thought learning self-defense and combat training was a far better use of my time.
“He either picked it up on the way, or he’s a master of hiding long hard things down his pants.” She chuckles.
“You know, they say if you aren’t careful during a one-night stand, you can end up living with that decision for the rest of your life,” Elaine says without missing a beat.
“I don’t need you to keep me safe, Blake,” I call out as he heads for the door. Pausing, he glances over his shoulder at me. “I know you don’t, but I want to.”
“The point is to grow into tomorrow, not dwell on today.”
Oh, I’ll get it, Blake. I’ll get it so hard. Tessa’s right—I should stop with the trash talk, both internal and external. Just focus on taking him down.
Funerals are for the living because the dead don’t give a damn.
But this shame isn’t because of what I failed to do for my mom; it’s because of what I did do to my dad.
“You’re a Hearing Tom. Like a Peeping Tom, but much worse.”
“No, it does make sense. Loss happens in an instant, but it lasts a lifetime.”
He treated me horribly from ages thirteen to eighteen, and his mom dying isn’t an excuse. Trauma makes you either a hero or a villain. He chose the latter, deciding to inflict his pain on others because he didn’t want to be the only one who felt it. My mom died too, but I wasn’t anyone’s monster as a result. So he doesn’t get a pass for that.
“I’m just kidding, son. Besides, zombies like brains, so I don’t need to worry about you out there at all.”
But I can see she’s different now that she’s lost her husband. That’s what death does. It changes you.
“And I realized I’d rather be full of fear with you by my side than the bravest man in the whole world without you. You’re not my one-night stand.”
“Found it on a doctor’s corpse at the hospital after I vomited. Couldn’t let it go to waste.”
Right now, it doesn’t feel like the world ended, because mine is lying in my arms.
“I’d rather die with them today than spend the rest of my life with you.”
Tessa says with the smallest smile, trying to find humor in the darkest of times. That’s when we need it most. It’s easy to laugh when you’re happy.
Jesus, he’s like a super-sadistic Batman.
Just because the world ended doesn’t mean yours has to end too.
The world may have ended, but our humanity is endless.
