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Once we begin to take the time and effort to look at ourselves, those around us and our place in the world, we then begin to understand the simple equation of happiness: that it comes
from within, that it grows with sharing, that it is our choice and that it provides the easiest route to becoming the person we want to be.
Expectations come with the potential for much disappointment, whereas intentions simply get you into a good frame of mind, from which anything might happen and you no longer need to feel attached to one specific outcome.
One of the biggest obstacles to happiness is when there is a disconnect between what we know in our hearts is the right thing for us to do and what we actually do.
Sometimes I think we forget that work is life, rather than being something separate that we put up with so that we can have a comfortable life the rest of the time.
No fixed concept
Change Your Mental Habits
But I also meet people who have so much one might think they could never have any worries about money, yet who, from their own point of view, worry constantly about losing their riches or feel jealous of a neighbour whose house or car is even bigger than theirs. They live in fear that it will all disappear, even to the point of being miserly. I feel sorrow for these people who put off their happiness because of a way of seeing.
You can use your own mirror for this exercise: simply take a minute to look at yourself in the mirror. You can see every little detail – how tall you are, how many grey hairs you have today. But despite appearances, it is not real. Like the moon in the lake, the face you see is just a reflection.
There is no way to escape growing old. There is no way to escape ill health at some point during life. There is no way to escape death. Everything and everyone that I love is subject to the nature of change. There is no way to escape being separated from them. The only things that I own are my thoughts, my words and my actions. There is no escape from the consequences of these; they are the ground upon which I stand.
I say to people, ‘Sit on your cushion to look at your emotions.’ When we remove all the other distractions of life, we are left just with our minds. Then we can use what is in our minds to practise patience, compassion and love and emotions like anger and jealousy begin to dissolve into emptiness. I like the phrase ‘all things being equal’. Because at the end of the day, all things are equal – nothing is permanent, everything fades, so why cling on so tightly to things that aren’t even there any more? This will take many years of practice, but the good part is that just a little understanding
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When you a standing in a queue, in the car, walking in to the office – you can be anywhere – give yourself just a few seconds to wish happiness to the people around you.
Happiness is a chain reaction
When we understand that all of our thoughts, words and actions are linked in a chain reaction, we begin to appreciate just how much each of us affects the people and the environment around us, and likewise just what an effect they have on us. So do we want to affect people in a positive way or in a negative way? The choice is always ours to make; it’s up to us what kind of energy, or as we say ‘karma’, we want to give to the world.
People lock themselves up, always wanting silence, isolating themselves in the search for peace and calm. But if we cannot learn to have peace of mind when there is chaos around us, our minds will be very easily agitated. We will become angry at others for disturbing our peace. We will be irritated at the smallest fly or noise, so that our chances for peace of mind become slimmer and slimmer, as we have placed ...
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Your happiness never relies on others
All of these emotions came up because I was grieving for a loss – a loss of the reality I had created.
