Once Upon a Time in Dollywood

by Ashley Jordan

She unenthusiastically returned to her phone call, finding Maya still giggling. “Why are you like this?” “I should be asking you that,” Maya said. “Not you out here embarrassing the whole bloodline.”

😭😭😭

“He caught me off guard,” Eve said, louder this time, and she hoped Jamie had gotten too far away to hear. She hated the idea of him knowing he’d managed to fluster her and, seemingly, without trying. “Well, he sounds MAGA, so it’s probably best if you keep your distance anyway.” “Looked it, too,” Eve said. But if he really had known her grandma well enough to recognize her, she trusted that he wasn’t. “I think he’s harmless, though.”

Kmsl 🤣🤣

Eve only stared at him. “Did you…need something?” “No, I just…It’s good to see you again.” He hoped he wasn’t coming off too eager. He was a pretty low-key guy, but she had a way of making him feel like he was constantly doing too much. “Well, I’ll…probably see you again at some point,” she said plainly as she turned back to the register.

Oh eve you are so prickly 🤣🤣🤣

“Where did you get all this stuff?” she asked, running her finger along the smooth edge of the cabinet, almost magnetically drawn to it. “It’s beautiful.” “Oh, thank you. I um…I actually made it,” Jamie said. Eve was a little bit stunned and a little bit skeptical. Then again, it made some sense that the guy with the Jesus beard was a carpenter. “Really?”

a jesus beard 😭😭

“And how long have you lived here?” “Well, I don’t really…live here…” “Oh God.” She knew he looked homeless that day they met. “Who lives here?” “No, it’s my house.” He laughed at the panic that had surely claimed her face.

This character is so fucking funny omg im wheezing

She was a bit fascinated by the way white people—white men, especially—found it to be so elusive. Black folks rarely got to concern themselves with their version of happy. Didn’t ask for much beyond safety, financial stability, and family. Black happiness was too often rooted in plain old survival. White people seemed to define it by avoiding boredom.

“Maybe we should call Nikole,” Siobhan suggested. “I’m not bothering her at the beach with this,” Maya said. “Eve, why are you playing on my phone?”

“Eve, what do you want me to do with this information?” “I want you to tell me what to do!” “Sistren. You got this far without any input from me. Try just trusting your instincts.” Eve huffed at the useless advice. If her instincts were working, she wouldn’t be in this predicament in the first place. “Those haven’t done what they’re supposed to do since I met Jamie.” Maya was giving that blank stare again. “You want me to come down there? We can fight for real if that’s what you want. You know I got your address.”