Restitution (The Edge of Darkness, #3)

by Leigh Rivers

We aren’t together – haven’t been for a while – but Stacey is my girl. Mine.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. You’re okay. You’re safe with me,” he says softly as he strokes my hair, letting me cry into his chest. “I found you, little one.”

“I’ll need to treat you terribly.” “I know,” I reply, my eyes flicking to the side when I hear a man laughing. “I apologise in advance.”

How is the psychopath the sweetest character of the whole book

Barry pulls me into him – another hug I had no idea I needed. I wrap my arms around him just as tightly.

Little did I know, when he helped me off the bridge and drove me home, that would be the last time I’d see him. He broke his promise and, along with Kade, vanished from my life in the process.

This book hurts and I'm only on page 44.

We’ve been split up for three years now, and I don’t think I’ve ever stopped loving her. I don’t know how to not love her. Not a day goes by that I don’t despise myself for leaving her. We’d probably be married with kids by now.

“You die, I die,” he whispers. I can’t say it back.

My heart is breaking.

“With all due respect, sweetheart, I behave for no one when it comes to our children.”

Best dad.

“She couldn’t find out that I…” She backs away from me. She’s pale and looks exhausted. “Find out what?” I swallow a lump threatening to suffocate me and force out the words, even though they’re muffled through the material covering my mouth. “That I’m still in love with you.”

Tobias moves behind him and pries his eyeball open. I quickly turn away as Kade hammers a nail into it.

Teamwork makes the dream work.

The dam explodes, and he grips my wrist to stop me from removing the dried blood from his hair, his shoulders tensing as he lets out a deep sob that will be ingrained in my mind forever. The last time I heard him like this was when we saw the blood on the bed sheets – the moment we knew we’d lost our daughter. And even then, he controlled himself. He isn’t strong enough anymore.

Times this book has made me cry: 1

Tobias leans down and picks up the severed foot. “Think fast,” he says as he throws it at Barry’s face.

Ew, but hahaha.

The last thing I hear are whispered words in Russian. “Moya vechnost.”

THAT'S SO SWEET (with many thanks to ChatGPT for the translation)

He shrugs away from them and turns to Aria, who’s sobbing and begging him to stay, to find another way, but all he does is smile at her, take her face and kiss her on the lips. It’s more than just a kiss. It’s everything he wants. Everything he had. And everything he’ll lose. It’s a goodbye. A see you later. An eternity of wondering what if.

Times this book has made me cry: 2

I open my eyes to see Kade’s brother standing in front of me. He drops to his knees as Aria reaches him, but it’s too late.

I am no longer crying. I am SOBBING.

We buy books that sit on our bookcases and gather dust.

I feel really called out.

Even if that means taking a bullet for you… Jason kept his promise.

S O B B I N G

His wife with his dead son in her arms. The boy who was born when he was only eighteen. The kid Aria has raised with him since he was a few months old.

I'm never going to recover from this.

Jason McElroy is a hero. My hero. Everyone’s.

“Hearing Damage” by Thom Yorke plays, and Stacey groans. “I love this song.”

So do I.

She carefully takes my face between her hands, her pupils dilating more with every second. “I love you. I’ve loved you since we were eighteen. And I’ll love you until we’re old and grey and we’ve lived our whole lives together.”

Kade and Ewan are carrying the coffin, along with four of Jason’s friends, and the funeral director is leading the way to a deep plot. It was reserved years ago for Ewan and Aria; no one knew Jason would be the first to fill it.

Times this book has made me cry: 3

“I want your heart, every single fucking fragment that I’ve broken over the years. I have your past and your present, and I want to be a selfish asshole and have your future.”

It’s been so long since I felt him. All of him. I forgot how large he is. He’s thick, long and veiny. I might actually die if he pushes inside me.

Obviously that's something that had to be mentioned again.

“There’s been a huge social-media outpouring – reports of corruption in both the police and armed forces from the file you released. Victims have come forward and given evidence. Everyone is backing you, Kade. And I mean everyone.”

MY EYES ARE TEARING UP

I gulp, looking around the room, then at my mother. “But I’m not the good guy.” She smiles weakly. “Yes you are, sweetheart.”

That's it, I'm crying again.

Luciella comes up beside me. “I’m proud of you, Kade.” “Why?” She glances up at me, her eyes watering. “You survived.”

As happy and supportive as they all seem to be, someone in among them could be a spy or against us. Maybe even part of one of the empires I threw under the bus. If I’m marked for assassination, they could all be in danger.

DON'T RUIN THE MOMENT KADE

“Stop blaming yourself,” she replies and moves so she’s straddling me. Naked still, may I add.

I chuckled.

The world loves Kade.

So do I.

Base’s wedding has also been all over the news.

I'm going to ignore this. This never happened.

Jason was the one who snapped you out of the spiral. You were apologising to him for everything. He forgave you.”

Dammit I'm tearing up again.

“Because you’re going to be my wife. You’ve already taken my heart, my body, and my butchered soul, so you’ll take my fucking last name too.”

Base wipes his eyes and nods. “We survived.” “We did.” “Then why do I still feel dead inside?” he asks. “Why is it still hurting?” Kade grabs him by the nape and pulls him back in for a hug, slapping his back a few times. “We’ll be dead together. You die, I die, remember?”

There’s just something in my eye, okay?

“I’m proud of you. I don’t know if I’ve ever said it, but I am. You’ve gone through so much, endured so much pain that no person ever should, and you’re still standing here, alive, and surviving it all.” The corner of my mouth twitches. “I take after my old man.”

That makes me think of Jason, and my smile drops. So much loss, so many unsaid words – things I’ll never have the chance to tell him. He sacrificed himself for my girlfriend, for my happiness, and I’m going to make him proud by being what he always wanted me to be. Happy. I’m going to be fucking happy.

Times this book has made me cry: 5

“Giana is pregnant.”

Times this bok has made me cry: 6

My heart feels like it’s splitting in two.

Mine too.

“I was supposed to be your forever,” I sob, and it’s as if the world around us has slowed enough to let us have this last conversation. “You asked me on the beach in Greece if I’d be your forever, and I said yes.”

I stopped crying for a little bit so I guess this counts as 7.

“Forever, Freckles.”

No longer crying but SOBBING again.

“Can you still call me your girl even though I’m almost thirty now?” “You’ll always be my girl,” he says.

Gianna’s as a little boy the same age as the twins clutches her leg. It’s not hard to tell that he’s Jason’s son. Jason Junior. He’s his father’s double.

Jason wasn't a big character and yet I've shed so many tears for him.

Hopper, sadly, passed away six months ago.

NO. Just when I stopped crying.

my family and Kyle all met up in Greece, and we got married on the same beach where I told her I was in love with her.

She’s always been beautiful, but seeing her walking towards me with her hand in my father’s, a bright smile on her face, the mother of my child and my entire future, I knew I’d won at life.

He only just started walking – but all he does is run. It gives me a fucking heart attack half the time.

I know this all too well.

she’d been in labour for nearly two days

I know that all too well too.

“Like my body is breaking from the inside.”

Accurate.

“A beautiful baby girl,” she says. “With a full head of hair,” she adds with a huge smile.

Sounds like my daughter.

Another daughter. Our guardian angel is watching over us, protecting her siblings.