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“It would help if you let her explain.” My hand nearly crushes the phone to my ear. “No. We’ve already talked about this. Neither of them deserves to be fucking heard.”
“My family is happy – why would I ruin that? I hurt your mother by trying to love her the way she needed. As much as she will always be everything to me, I could never give her what she wanted.”
Little does she know that I’m the monster that goes bump in the night.
Kade driving faster and ignoring me isn’t helping. “That night, I was—” Raped. I stop, a lump sticking in my throat. I fail to say it aloud. “It wasn’t…” What you think. “I didn’t…” Want to do it. But all I can finish with is, “I’m… I’m sorry.”
“You left me. I needed you, and you left without even trying to fight for me!”
“You cried for me? When? While you were on top of him?”
Because fuck him. Losing your voice to everyone is one thing, but losing your voice to someone you loved – trusted – is ten million times worse.
“I’m going to fuck your throat, and you’re going to be a good girl and swallow every drop of my cum.”
“Good girl. If there’s anything I miss about us, it’s how well you suck my cock.” He’s still hard as he snatches my throat. “Now climb up here and fucking ride me.”
“I might kill Barry,” I whisper against Kade’s ear, feeling him shiver. Kade sighs and drops his head to my shoulder, gripping my hips before lifting me up enough to break the intimate connection. “I’ll do it for you. I have a gun in my bag.” I laugh, but the way he’s scowling at Barry while he helps me to my feet and fixes my dress, before pulling his boxers up, I have a feeling he isn’t joking.
“Breathe, Freckles,” he whispers. “You’re safe with me.”
“Be patient with me,” is all I say before I capture her lips with mine.
“You are aware that you’re the only person in the world I’d never hurt, right?” “If that was the case, then you wouldn’t have walked out of my life when I needed you the most.” I shake my head. “You already did hurt me.”
“Don’t be afraid of me, Freckles. Sometimes people need to change to survive.”
I wasn’t lying when I said that what happened wasn’t my fault. I had no idea what I was doing or what goddamn reality I was in. All I knew was that I’d never felt that level of panic before. I’d just wanted my boyfriend and only found out the following morning that I wasn’t in my boyfriend’s bed.
“You plan on killing an entire gang for a girl who apparently cheated on you?”
“My name is Kade. Kade Mitchell. Son of Tobias. Maybe I should carve it into your skin? Will you still call me Nāve then?”
Killing high-profile people, dealing with drug lords, drinking a ridiculous amount of alcohol, beheading and disembowelling, and even walking into a gang’s territory to unleash hell I can deal with – but not a cheat. Not a fucking liar who made me think they were someone to me when they weren’t. How anyone could look someone in the eye and tell them they loved them, only to go fuck someone else hours later is beyond me.
Freckles, darling, I’m a fucking animal. You should’ve seen me Jackie Chan my shit today.
If you didn’t cheat on me, I wouldn’t have been outside the studio that night, contemplating going in to see you, and Bernadette wouldn’t have found me.
palm instantly presses to my cheek as she kisses me back. I could kiss her forever.
I want to sink my cock into her deep enough that I’ll never get it back out.
I’m Kade Mitchell. I don’t do emotions. I don’t care about people, especially not people who fuck me over. So why can’t I stop looking at her?
If only he knew how old this scan is.
Kind of sad if you think about it. Being in love with the same woman for over twenty years and knowing they’ll never have a happy ending must be hard. Sometimes I compare their story to mine and Stacey’s, and wonder if I’ll still be watching her in twenty years.
“I wish you never met Luciella.” And the bucket of ice that hits me then washes away that feeling. “I wish I didn’t kiss you that night.”
I don’t go home with random men. It took me everything to join Tinder after what happened to me. This is purely to save his life.
I no longer see the young American but Chris and numerous other men standing in Kade’s grip, uncaring as they talk about all the ways they wanted to fuck me that night. The way Chris egged them on. Charged per fuck. Videoed it. I see my brother hovering over me while I hallucinated, begged him to take me home and cried that I wanted my boyfriend. The way his lips felt on my forehead while he let someone else violate me with their mouth. Teeth sinking into my breast, leaving a wound that took weeks to heal. No Name isn’t No Name. He’s another Chris, who drugs and destroys, breaks and
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He shakes his head. “Because I’d go insane without being able to watch you. I do hate you. I hate who you are, but I can’t stop thinking about your cunt strangling my cock while I throttle you. I picture you covered in blood that isn’t yours. My name on your lips. Screaming for more while you apologise over and over and fucking over again.” He presses the barrel harder to my forehead. “Hate is not the word I would use when it comes to you.”
“I want you to cum on my gun.” He moves it against my pussy, my underwear in the way, and I let out a moan.
“Watch what I do to her. Watch how well she takes my cock while you lie there and wait for death. Let her screams for more be the last thing you fucking hear.”
For some diabolical reason, having my best friend’s brother screw me while a version of Chris lies in front of us makes me even more turned on. He’s at gunpoint. About to die, and the last thing he’ll see is me being fucked by Kade Mitchell.
“Oh God.” There’s a sting on my ass cheek, and he grits out, “I’m not putting all this effort in for you to call some other fucker’s name.” He pummels into me harshly. “Say my fucking name.”
In my peripheral vision, I see a river of blood trailing towards us. We’re fucking next to a dead body.
“You make me feel worthless for something that wasn’t my fault.
“We are friends,” she says, and I feel like tossing her in the loch. “But we’re also more.” “Hmm…” She hums back. “You haven’t asked me yet.” I narrow my eyes. “I’m not asking, Freckles. You’re going on a date with me.”
This isn’t who I am, someone who sleeps with taken, completely unavailable men. I feel dirty and used.
Kade: The fuck are you on about? Kade: I don’t have a girlfriend. When would I have time for that? You think I’d fuck you when I was with someone else? Kade: Although, jealousy looks cute on you.
“Well, I’m drawn to you, Freckles. And it infuriates me that I am. I could be inside someone else, yet all I can see is you.”
“I want to degrade you while you sit on my cock. Praise you as you swallow every drop of my cum. I want to brand every inch of your skin with my mouth and make sure you’re unable to even look at another man.”
“Mani pārdod seksam un nāvei, lai aizsargātu visus, kurus mīlu.” Kade leans into me more, raising his other hand between us to tuck another strand of hair behind my ear. I tilt my head, utterly confused by whatever language he’s speaking. He licks his lips. “Tajā skaitā jūs, vasaras raibumi.”
“I’m new to this, so I have no idea how it works. If you want to see other people, then go for it.” The words taste like poison. “I can’t promise their bodies won’t show up in the River Clyde though.”
She shrugs. “Big ones. I always get scared I’ll stand on the smaller ones. Do you like dogs?” “Yeah. I want two Dobermanns.”
“His emotions are learned and controlled,” Tobias interrupts. “But when he first started going out with you? He was constantly on the phone with me or sitting down with Aria, trying to figure out what was wrong with him. He wanted to know why he felt something that made no sense to him. My son wanted medication to suppress urges and impulsiveness, to make sure he didn’t ruin you like I did his mother. But little did he know all he was feeling was love.”
“I’m sorry your son did that, I really am, but if he ever sat down and let me explain, he’d know that the ten-second video he was sent was heavily edited from three hours of drugging and non-consensual activity.”
“You were attacked.” I nod. “Who?” “Please.” I shiver. “We need to focus on Kade first. What’s done is done.” Tobias gets to his feet, walking to stand in front of me. I don’t flinch as he rests his hand on my shoulder. “She was my granddaughter. No one takes from me and gets away with it. Once I deal with Kade, I’m going to hunt down whoever is responsible. I promise you, little one.” I smile weakly. “You don’t need to hunt for him – he lives right under my roof.”
“I guess I wanted your voice to be the last I heard…” I straighten. “What? What do you mean?” “I took something I shouldn’t have, and I needed to hear you before…” he slurs. “Wait, I’m not hallucinating, am I? Are you actually talking to me?”
“Who was I to pay to have sex with you?” “The she-devil.” Kade yawns. “She’s horrible, if you haven’t met her yet.” “What’s her name?” He shakes his head. “Not allowed to say.” “Are you a male prostitute?” “You could say that, yeah. An escort with perks…” His voice trails off.
“We’re the same. When we’re ready, we’ll learn from each other. No rushing. Okay?”
She’s the definition of beautiful, and she wants me. She belongs to me. I’m whipped, and she isn’t even my girlfriend.
