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It was only four minutes long, but something about the tone of his deep voice must have soothed Juno because she settled as soon as it started and stayed quiet until it ended.
“It’s more than that. It’s everything. The phone call. The house. You offering a place for us to stay. I had no idea I was going to need a hero today, but since I very clearly did, I’m really glad it was you.”
I nudge his knee with mine. “Hey. You know you’re more than a hockey player, right?” He looks up sharply, like my words have surprised him. “You’re a brother, a son, a friend, a human. You’ll still be all those things when you stop playing hockey.”
When I step into the kitchen, Evie looks up, and her mouth falls open. I’ve always appreciated the tradition of game-day suits—I like having a reason to dress up—but Evie’s expression makes it even more worth it. “Wow,” Evie says. “You look really nice.” “Yeah?” I slide a hand down my tie, then hook my thumbs on the edge of my pants pockets.
haven’t felt a stronger sense of victory since we took the Calder Cup last season. Juno is asleep—in my arms. I did this. And it feels amazing.
And then my heart climbs into my throat because Alec starts to sing. At first I can’t quite make out what, exactly, he’s singing, but then he turns so he’s facing me again, and I pick up the chorus to Phil Collins’, “You’ll Be in My Heart.” It’s an old song. Stupid old. I only know it from the Tarzan movie that played on repeat in the waiting room of the children’s hospital where my little brother got all his chemo treatments.
Seeing Alec hold Juno brings into stark clarity just how much she’s missing by not having her dad around. Not that I can imagine Devon ever being this gentle, this patient with Juno.
I nod and sniff. “Just tired.” I take a slow breath, my eyes falling closed again. “Tired of doing this alone.” Alec’s hand brushes down my cheek, and I can’t keep myself from leaning into his touch. “You aren’t alone,” he whispers. “Now try to sleep.”
I want lazy mornings in bed with my wife, a kid tucked between us. I want to make coffee for someone as easily as I make it for myself. I want to talk about a baby laughing or rolling over for the first time. I want to be a dad.
“People do the best they can with the knowledge they have. And they often buy what they can afford. I’m happy to help because I’d rather they play something than nothing at all.”
But the thing at the Summit isn’t optional, so if I have to be there…” He gives me a pointed look. “Misery loves company?” His eyebrows lift playfully. “I was thinking more…maybe it won’t be miserable if you’re there with me?”
She tilts her head and smiles. “So you’re saying real men aren’t afraid of boybands or therapy.” I chuckle. “I’d also wear that t-shirt.”
But maybe it’s not so complicated. Maybe fatherhood is just a matter of paying attention, of noticing what your family needs, then stepping up to take care of that need. It’s being present. Invested. Willing. Alec looks back and meets my eye one more time before he leaves. “I’ll see you at home?” I nod, and he follows Summer and Nathan out the door, taking a tiny piece of my heart with him as he goes.
“Yes! Absolutely. I’m just…” She closes her eyes and swallows before she opens them again, her hands moving to her hips. “The thing is, I don’t really feel like I’m at my best right now. My body is tired and a little squishy and it’s been a while since I’ve felt particularly sexy. But somehow, when you look at me, I do feel sexy. I feel…alive. And desired. Like I’m waking up from a really long sleep.”
“First of all,” I say, my voice low. “Everything about you is sexy. Every inch. Every curve.” I drop my fingers from her face and find her hand, lifting it to my chest. I slip it inside my coat and press it over my hammering heart. “Do you feel that? That’s what you do to me.”
“If you come back, it’ll be for, what, two, maybe three more seasons? Four, if you’re lucky? But all of us will be done by the time we’re forty,” he continues. “Probably sooner. And then what?” He holds up a finger and points at me. “But see, you already figured out what comes next for you. You already have something else to live for.” He shrugs. “Why not just go do that now?” I already have something else to live for.
“The true meaning of life, Captain. And I have you to thank for that.” He’s halfway across the living room on his way to the stairs when he turns and adds, “Spoiler alert. The answer isn’t hockey.”
