Heroic Path: In Search of the Masculine Heart

by John Sowers

Many have never tasted this tonic. We have no draughts of wildness to press against our lips. No wells, springs, or rivers to drink from with cupped hands. Young men are usually invited to drink by an elder. But we have no elders. No initiation rites. No place. We have no clear road or definition of manhood. We don’t even have language for it. We look to Mom, but she is busy warning us about the woods. “You’ll put your eye out,” she scolds. We look to pop culture, and find exaggerations or ridicules of masculinity. Without a lantern, the wild places feel forbidden. Dangerous. We may summon the courage to wander out into the woods, but we have no road markers. No sense of direction. No map. We wonder: “Am I a man?” But the answer is a moving target. Even at thirty or forty or fifty, we may feel and act boyish. Our friends tell us we become a man when we lose our virginity. Have our first fistfight. Make a million dollars. Mom says we become men when we graduate college, get a job, and settle down. Culture says manhood is not trustworthy or is irrelevant. Gender is a choice—men may become women and vice versa, based on whim or feeling. Children take hormone therapy if they feel like a “boy” or a “girl” trapped inside. We are tragically lost.