Men are told not to cry; tears are a sign of weakness. I grew up afraid of my shame; I hated how fragile it made me. As I wept, I found the opposite to be true. It took courage for me to sit down in the ash heap and mourn. The grief was not making me weaker—it was setting me free. Martin Shaw adds: “Wildness is the capacity to go into joy, sorrow, and anger fully and stay there as long as needed, regardless of what anyone else thinks. Wildness carries sobriety as well as exuberance, and has allowed loss to mark its face.”
