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Besides, I don’t like blood unless I’m drinking it. Even then I’m a picky bitch.
I’d loved once, but then she turned out to be off her rocker more than I am, so I skedaddled right on out of that relationship. I haven’t been in a serious one since, but I’ve remained what you might call a romantic at … well, I don’t have a heart so I’m not sure where exactly. But it’s there. Somewhere.
Vampirism isn’t a cure for everything, and my shit eyesight carried over when I was changed. It’s not entirely a bad thing since I can pull off a pair of glasses like nobody’s business.
And frankly, men are like plants, if you don’t water them, they’ll die, and I don’t have a green thumb.
Celine Brennan. My obsession and she doesn’t even know it yet.
“I think...” His humerus bone snaps under my shoe. “...that I don’t want a filthy creature like you...” His fingers crunch with ease in my hand. “...touching what belongs to me.”
“A divine angel like her is a blessing to the eyes and you are nothing but lowly trash unworthy of looking upon her,”
I’m practically humping her like a dog, and I’d let her leash me any day.
Whether she is or isn’t, I’m into what she’s into. Whatever she wants I’ll give her. Except another man. I’d kill him before I’d let another man ever touch her.
“Have you been dickmatized?” She searches my eyes imploringly.
HAHAA
Children are one of my least favorite things with their whining, screaming, and messiness but it can usually be blamed on shitty parenting. My one exception for a crotch goblin is if Celine wants children. I’ll give her as many as she desires. I look forward to practicing the baby making. Wait. Babies. Celine. I need to write that down. Pulling my trusty notebook and pen out of my pocket I lick my finger and flip it open to a new page. Quickly scribbling, Breed Celine, under a new list titled Goals in my long life with Celine.
Make sure Celine always wears a seatbelt. Safety is hot.
Celine touched me. Celine. Touched. Me.
“Whoever hurt you, just tell me and I’ll kill them.”
“Celine wants you to take her on a date.” “What?” Zavier and I shout simultaneously, a grin quickly spreading across his face. “Ava,” I hiss vehemently. “I’d love to,” Zavier responds cheerily, linking his arm with mine.
“Oh, please. Zavier whatever-your-last-name-is-know-it-all.”
He grabs my finger so quickly I can barely react and nips at it. I try to pull away, but he refuses to let go. “Lockwood. Zavier Lockwood. L-O-C-K-W-O-O-D. Why aren’t you writing this down? It’s going to be your last name one day, too.” His grin is downright wicked.
“And I want to know even more about you, Celine Won’t-Face-The-Truth-Brennan.”
Zavier’s Date Ideas for Whooing His Mate: Bowling - Asher’s bitch ass ruined this one Karaoke - Show off my golden pipes Navy Pier, Ferris Wheel - Basic and done before Skip everything and go straight to fucking her senseless - My favorite
“I promise.” “I don’t believe you.”
“You. Called. Me. Zav.” A girly sounding teehee comes out of his mouth and I roll my eyes.
“I have to practice, Mr. Meow Meow. You don’t get it.”
“This has to be perfect. By the end of the night, I am kissing this woman and convincing her we’re meant to be together.”
“Meow.” “Exactly, my friend. You and I know she and I are meant to be together, but she has to admit it to herself.”
Did I sneak into her apartment to get a pep talk from my hype kitty? Absolutely. Midnight is my best friend.
The door swings open revealing the most ethereal being I’ve ever seen in my life.
“Your knight in shining armor is here.” She accepts it with a smirk. “Knight in shining armor,” she says in a playful, mocking tone. “I'm no damsel in distress.” “No, you aren’t,” I concede. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t sweep you off your feet.” My brows waggle and she lightly swats me with her free hand. “Let’s go, Casanova.”
“Mine is Rose.” He grins. “Beautiful, just like your first name. Did you know Celine means heavenly in French? It aligns perfectly with my theory that you’re an angel. Heavenly flower is even more appropriate if you ask me.”
I love that sound. A man who whimpers and moans for his woman is such a turn on.
“When I officially make you mine, it’ll be on a lush bed and not on hard glass. You deserve more.”
“Is there anything you can’t do?” “I’m shit at patience.” The irony isn’t lost on me what with how long I’ve been alive. Her eyes sparkle with humor. “I could’ve told you that.”
Nobody fucks with my girl and gets away with it.
“First off, I resent the fact you think I can’t protect her.” Celine rolls her eyes at my comment, but I continue. “Second, it’s kind of perfect, isn’t it? I doubt they think she’ll stay this close to the scene of the crime and if they come back, we can catch them red handed. Third, how dare you? I’m perfectly capable of watching out for Celine.”
“I’ll take the couch.” She announces suddenly and I have to resist the urge to hold my hand to my chest like a Victorian child with the plague. “I think the fuck not,” I refute. “Excuse me?”
“Did you hear me?” “You want to get married and have my babies? Great plan. Love that plan.”
“Meow.” The disgruntled sound behind me shows Midnight making himself at home on my makeshift bed. The bakery has opened, and he is working overtime to produce biscuits.
“It’s been five minutes,” he whines. “You’re telling me I need to wait longer to be pretty?” “Beauty is pain and patience.”
“I think I like girl’s night,” he muses. Ava pats his arm. “Oh, sweetie. This is only the tip of the iceberg of what girl’s night can be.” He gives her a dopey grin. “I can’t wait for the next one.”
“Midnight,” I grind out. “Your mother is going to be the death of me. Not the literal death, since I can’t die easily, but at least the death of my dick.” “Meow.” I sigh, “Thanks, bud.”
Celine. My mate. This can’t be the end. She doesn’t know how big of a dick I have yet. I’m going to die and she doesn’t even know. This is the worst.
“A man almost died in front of me and downed blood like it was Kool-Aid.”
inside. “Zavier, you better not be dead! I haven’t gotten to interrogate you Detective Brennan style yet!”
“Please, don’t be afraid of me. Don’t pull away.” His baritone voice cracks, breaking my heart. “I can’t stand
I am indeed crusty, but hey, at least I’m the sexiest crusty vampire she’ll ever meet.
Twisting toward her, I hold her to me like the most precious thing in the world. Because she is.
“Number one, you stay in the car.” She inches closer to me. “Number two, you stay in the car.” Toe to toe now. “Finally, number three, can you guess?” “Hmm.” I tap my chin in mock thought. “Stay in the car?” She smiles widely when I answer appropriately.
“Tom, this is Celine, my friend who I want to be my girlfriend, but she won’t admit it, so I just say friend.”
Needy vampire.
“Zavier Lockwood,” I scold and he straightens to attention at the edge in my tone and use of his full name. “You know what I meant. Don’t play dumb.”
“Kiss me already,” I growl, all patience leaving me. “So demanding,” Zav murmurs against my cheek.
