The Lair

by Lisina Coney

For everyone who feels like they have to hide who they truly are. The real you is always worth it.

Home. I didn’t know the meaning of that word. Never had and suspected I never would.

“You can use white too,” he says, his voice sounding a lot throatier than before. Or maybe it’s just my deranged head. “So it matches yours.”

“No one’s gonna mess with you.” “You don’t know that.” “I’ll break his goddamn legs if he so much as thinks about it.”

“Do you want to stay a while?” The question is out before I can stop myself. “I mean, if you have somewhere else to be⁠—” “I can stay,” he says. “If you want me to.”

“Careful, boss man. I might start thinking you tolerate me after all.” “I more than tolerate you, Allie.”

Robert opens his mouth. “You b⁠—” “Careful how you speak to my girl.” The air whooshes out of my lungs. My girl. Me… Travis’s girl?

“There’s nothing silly about doing what you love.”

until it dawns on me that this is my life. That someone, for some reason, met me and thought I was cool. Cool enough to want to be my friend.

“You’re okay,” that gruff voice says in a gentle tone I’d never heard from him before. “You were so fucking brave, Allie. I’m proud of you.”

“You’re safe now, sweetheart. I’m not gonna let anything happen to you.”

the man who just hugged me and glued all my broken pieces back together staying right at my back the whole time. A bodyguard.

“You’re moving in with me.”

AWWWWWW HELLLL FUCKIN YEAH. LISINA CONEY I LOVE U FOR THIS

“I live alone in a farmhouse just ten minutes away. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms.

girl if you don’t accept, I WILL!! MOVE OUT OF THE WAY

“Because I want you to be safe at all times, goddammit. If anything happened to you…”

I might not survive moving in with Travis Ward after all.

Maybe hiding out in the lair with the big bear is exactly what this scared rabbit needs.

I didn’t expect to, but I feel at home here. I think… I think I’m starting to build a life here, a life I really like.”

but because Travis is wearing sweatpants. Gray ones.

GIIIIRL YYUMMMMM

“You’re something else, sweetheart.”

allie can i be you rn

He closes the distance between us slowly. The next thing I feel are his warm lips on my forehead, pressing a lingering kiss to my skin. “Good night, sweetheart. Thanks for taking care of my grumpy ass.”

OH MY GAAAAAAAAAAWDDDDD

“Don’t you think it’s getting a little late, old man?” Uncle Neil rolls his eyes. “All right, all right. You want some alone time with Allie-girl, I get it.” My cheeks heat up. “Oh, that’s⁠—” “Damn right I do.”

“You’re my favorite person, Travis.” “And you are my weakness, Allie.”

“You have no idea what you do to me. Do you, sweetheart?”

My nose nuzzles his. My voice is barely above a whisper when I ask him, “You don’t want me to go on a date?” “Only if it’s with me.”

“You have no fucking idea,” he whispers between kisses, his voice as hungry as his touch. “How badly I need you. Like the fucking sun.”

MEOW

Because Charlie has just caught me making out with our boss in the middle of the bar. Did I mention my legs are wrapped around his waist and his hands are in a very inappropriate place? I don’t know what I expected Charlie to do, but it wasn’t to point a finger at us with a huge grin on his face and say, “I fucking knew it.” Travis and I watch his smirk grow wider, clearly unfazed by having walked in on us. “You know what? Good for you,” Charlie says with a shrug. “It was about damn time anyway. Just tell me I can wear sneakers to the wedding because dress shoes make my feet hurt, and I plan to dance until you kick me out.”

i am cry laughing right now

I could never come back to a place that never felt like home. As I sped down the highway, I wondered if I’d ever find a place that did. And I promised myself that if I ever did, I’d never ruin it.

“You’re gonna look at me with those beautiful eyes and tell me I don’t know that you’re the strongest fucking person I’ve ever met, and that I admire you more than I’ve ever admired anyone? You’re gonna tell me I don’t know that you love carrot cake beyond reason, that you change into your pajamas as soon as you get home because you can’t stand sitting on the couch with your outside clothes on, that you love cooking because it brings you peace, that math gives you a purpose, and that your lips aren’t the sweetest fucking thing I’ve ever tasted? That’s what you’re gonna do, Allie?”

“However long it takes you, Allie, I’ll be here. You’ve got me, sweetheart. I’m not going anywhere.”

Because Travis feels like the home I never expected to find.

“I want that too, sweetheart. All of it. Whenever you’re ready, it’s yours. Every single fucking thing you ask me for.”

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Allie. I don’t know how I ever managed to live without you.”

“And when you’re ready, if you ever are, The Lair will always be your home. I will always be your home. Okay?”

There’s something to be said about selfishness. Why is it considered self-centered to have boundaries? Why would it make me a bad person to say no or to refuse certain things and accept others? Why is loving oneself and showing it so frowned upon sometimes?

“I love you,” I breathe out. “I love you so much, Travis. I’m ready for this. For us. I’ll have bad days, and I can’t promise I’ll be happy and cheery all the time, but I’m done waiting. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and only you.” He wipes away a tear I hadn’t noticed. The love shining in his eyes fills my heart, my soul, every fiber of my being. “I love you too, sweetheart. More than I’ve ever loved anyone else. I’ll always be here for you, Allie. On your good and bad days. You’re it for me. Until the day I take my last goddamn breath.”

And Travis? He shows me every day that I matter. That I deserve to take up space. That I’m lovable. For me, that’s enough.

“I’m so fucking in love with you,” he mutters against my skin as he kisses his way back up to my mouth—and all right, it feels incredible to hear it too.

Come here, beautiful.”

This man who grunted at me the first time we met, who installed an extra lock on my apartment door without me having to ask, who made friendship bracelets with me, who opened up about his past, who offered me a safe haven when I needed it the most—he was always meant to be mine. And I, his. Irrevocably.

“Let me tell you a secret,” he whispers in my ear. His voice no longer sounds playful but charged with heat. “These hands can make you feel good too. Want me to show you?”

“That’s my girl.”

“I’m trying not to come in my pants like a fucking teenager, just from thinking I’ll be the first and the last man to touch you.”

“Deep breaths, sweetheart,” he instructs, sounding like he’s struggling to breathe too. “Let me fill you up.”

He leans down to kiss me on the lips. “I love you, Allie. So much. You’re my life.” His words squeeze my heart. “And you’re mine.” I sleep in his bed for the first time that night, with one of his arms protectively wrapped around me. The first of forever.

“Char, he hired you as our marketing manager after you left for Boston. Don’t you think that means he trusts you?”

“And yet here you are. Right in the bear’s lair.” I smile. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”