Alchemised

by SenLinYu

“It was one of the conditions the Falcon had for allowing me in the city. Since vivimancy is a corruption of the soul that begins in the womb, it could—it could be passed on. I’d already taken vows as a healer that I wouldn’t ever marry or have children,

damn thats fucked up? who are the bad guys here?

“Mandl here was abandoned at birth, raised as an orphan in one of the aeries. Children like her were told their soul’s corruption must be purified, and that if they did what was asked, they might be wanted someday.” Stroud shrugged. “Of course, neither the Faith nor Paladia ever did want them for anything but forced labour. And look, they handled you the same way.”

Okay not really liking the eternal flame much

He raised an eyebrow. “I’ll tell you if you swallow it like a good girl.”

The face in front of her was strangely pale, emotive for an instant and then blank as she managed to focus her eyes on it.

“Do I know you?” she asked as her eyes slid closed. “I suppose you do.”

AHHHHHH CRYING ALREADY

She paused, replaying the interaction. His slow enunciation as he’d answered her question. She’d been speaking in Etrasian.

Ferron’s lips remained pressed against Aurelia’s, but as he kissed her, he raised his eyes, and his gaze locked onto Helena’s face.

The whole family was dead within a minute, bodies left sprawled across the floor, still linked by their chains.

A mercy killing

When she climbed into her bed, she could still see Ferron’s shadow outside her door. Somehow, knowing it was his, the sight of it didn’t frighten her even though it should have.

Heheehhehehe

He didn’t look at her. “I was commanded to marry her, so I married her. I was never commanded to care.” Helena stopped in her tracks. “You sound as enslaved as I am.”

It was a gruesome photo, even in black and white. Kneeling down, his face plain to see, Ferron was calmly disembowelling Lancaster in the lobby of the Central Hospital.

Yes kaine DISEMBOWEL HIM KING

“Well, you—you have a natural talent for it. In another life, you could be a healer.” “One of life’s great ironies,” he said, glancing towards the door, his jaw tight.

Crying

“And you, sir. Remarkable that you could manage such delicate healing through imitation. Very impressive. You should work in the hospital.” “So I’m told,” Ferron said with an insincere smile. “Do you think they’ll still hire me after I murdered someone in the lobby?” The man blanched. “Well—what I mean is—”

“But at this point I suppose I deserve to burn. I wonder if you’ll burn, too.” His face was so close the words brushed against her lips, and his mouth crashed against hers.

“I have warned you, if something happens to you, I will personally raze the Eternal Flame. That isn’t a threat. It is a promise. Consider your survival as much a necessity to the Resistance as Holdfast’s. If you die, I will kill every single one of them.”

There was something about the way Ilva said it that made Helena feel that a pardon was not all Ferron had asked for. “And…?” “He wants you, Marino,” Crowther said. “Both now and after the war.”

Crowther said with another thin, empty smile. “Ferron was quite specific that you have to be willing.” This had to be a test. They wouldn’t do this, not after everything… Ilva wouldn’t sell her.

But they would sell you for far less bbygirl

Crowther only scoffed. “I’m sure Ilva has filled your head with pretty stories about your importance, but you’re easily replaced. We already have several candidates under consideration.” The room went briefly out of focus, and Helena felt as if she’d been kicked in the stomach.

Asshole I hope he dies

“Was that—before you killed Principate Apollo?” Ferron stared at her, his mouth twisting. “Are you wanting a confession? Shall I tell you everything I’ve done?” She stared into his mocking eyes. “Do you want to?”

SCREAMING AGAIN, the parallels to part 1

“Don’t die, Marino. I might miss you.”

“I must admit,” he said in a low voice as though making a confession, “if anyone had told me you’d become so lovely, I would never have come near you. I was rather blindsided when I saw you again.”

HEHEHEHEHEHEHE

“You’re like a rose in a graveyard,” he said, and his lips twisted into a bitter smile. “I wonder what you could have turned into without the war.”

SCREAMING YESSSSSSS

“Why do you do that?” he asked after a minute. “My father used to do this for me,” she said without looking up. “He said alchemists were like surgeons, so we have to take care of our hands.” “But why are you doing it for me?”

“You made me feel like the parts of me that aren’t useful still deserve to exist. Like I’m not just all the things I can do.”

Crying

They were the inverse and counter to each other. A healer and killer, circling slowly, the push and pull inexorable.

A smirk twisted his mouth as he looked at her. “There are far worse fates than dying, Marino.” She nodded. “I know. But that one you don’t come back from.” He gave a bitter laugh. “All right, then, but only because you asked.”

THE PRIOR COMMITMENTS FROM PT1 I CANT

He looked away from her then, his face twisting. “But you—you—” He shook his head. “It doesn’t really matter. You outmanoeuvred me. Or maybe I’m just too tired and grieving to keep pushing you away. You won.” He met her eyes for a moment, his expression bitter and derisive. “Well done.”

His breathing grew ragged and uneven. “You sold yourself to save the person you care about. Well, so did I. What was I supposed to do, fail to kill Principate Apollo knowing I wouldn’t be the one who’d suffer for it? This”—he gestured towards himself—“this was how I proved I’d be loyal, how I got him t—” His breath caught. “—to stop hurting her.”

Poor Kaine, my little baby :(

Helena didn’t know what to do. She ran her fingers through his hair and just held him. “I can’t—I can’t do this again—” he finally gasped out. “I can’t care for someone again. I can’t take it.” She blindly found his face, pressing her hand against his cheek, felt tears slide along her palm and down her wrist.

For the first time, Kaine Ferron was fully human to her. She’d slipped through his walls and peeled away the defensive layers of malice and cruelty, and found that there he carried a broken heart. She could use that.

Can’t believe she’s still using him that’s crazy to me

Crowther’s eyebrows furrowed as he studied her. “I’ve spent a year working on the logistics of replacing you…I must admit, you are the most exceptional asset the Eternal Flame possesses. And I am sorry for that.”

Again I hope he dies

“The same way I know any of it,” he said, staring across the room. “When you can’t die, people keep hurting you until you can hurt them more.” “I’m sorry.”

WHY DO YOU HURT HIM MORE HELENA!!

“I’m sure there’s something poetic in it all, but right now all I feel is a new set of manacles.” He let go and stepped away from her, heading for the door. “So forgive me if I dislike looking at you. I’m still adjusting to the ways these new ones chafe.”

HELENA STOPPPPP HURTING HIM

The lich smiled again, the corpse’s bloated lips splitting into a rotten grin. “Don’t you recognise me, Sebastian? I’d think you would, after all the effort you and Apollo put into executing me. Afraid it didn’t stick. Not like the axe did when I split your brother’s skull.” “Atreus,”

Thats why he recognized helena in pt1

She cowered back, looking for Blackthorne in terror and spotted him being dragged by his throat through the water, a wire or rope wrapped around his neck. The person dragging him wasn’t one of the Resistance. It was one of the Undying. Immediately identifiable by the helmet and black uniform.

KAINE IS HERRREEEEEE YESSSSSSS

A weapon gleamed so quick that she barely saw it, just watched the bodies fall. It was Kaine. She’d never seen him fight. He’d never really fought with her. But she knew. There was no mistaking that brutal efficiency. He was as deadly as she’d imagined.

Yes kaine slaughter them ALLLLL BBY

She recognised the technique. She hadn’t realised he’d paid attention. “You could be a healer,” she finally said as he removed the block on her nerves. She flexed her hand, opening and closing. It was still sore, and fragile as though hairline-fractured. “You have a natural talent for it.” “That’s one of the most ironic things anyone has ever said to me,” he said quietly.

Crying again the parallels to pt1

“You are not replaceable,” he said, his hands trembling against her shoulders. “You are not required to make your death convenient. You are allowed to be important to people. The reason I’m here—the reason I’m doing any of this—is to keep you alive. To keep you safe. That was the deal.” He searched her face. “They didn’t tell you.” She shook her head, giving a broken sob and—before she let herself think—she kissed him.

IF YOU DONT LOVE HIM ALREADY HELENA I WILL SCREAM

He pulled her close, crushing her to his chest. “You’re mine. You swore yourself to me. Now and after the war. I’m going to take care of you. I’m not going to let anyone hurt you. You don’t have to be lonely. Because you’re mine.”

HEHEHEHEHEHE

Helena knew she should go, but she had lost herself there. She was locked in the dangerous embrace of Kaine Ferron, and it felt like home.

The war had drilled itself into her bones, carving away at her until there was hardly anything left except what made her useful, an ideal component in an elaborate machine, but Kaine had reminded her that she was human; that not every trait and ability and quality she possessed only mattered insomuch as it was useful to someone else. That she was allowed to breathe sometimes. Now, in his absence, she felt herself suffocating.

Oh lord this book is going to break me

The war was a cage with no escape.

“If the nullium were encased in ceramic, that would prevent the corrosion and biointerference. If you put a thin tube of it right through the wrist here”—she pressed her fingers against the space between the radius and ulna—“the cuff could slot around a suppression spike and alchemically lock in place. I bet there wouldn’t be any resonance then.”

Damn she designed her own manacles

“I’m just—” She scrubbed her eyes. “I’m so tired. Everything I do feels like I’m delaying the inevitable, saving someone one day so they’ll die in a worse way tomorrow. I wish I’d never become a healer.”