Alchemised

by SenLinYu

She rested her head on his shoulder, entwining her arm with his as they sat there in the lengthening dark, amid the ruins of all they’d once been. They just needed more time.

“It seems you developed an irregular heartbeat from the strain and distress of your imprisonment and pregnancy. They detected it during your coma, but I was told that if I could keep you calm, it might resolve itself. Seems unlikely now, though.”

Her mouth went dry. “But I have to save you.” “No.” The word was sharp. “You don’t. And you can’t. You are the only person who has never understood that.”

She shook her head. “I don’t want to choose. I always have to choose, and I never get to choose you. I’m so tired of not getting to choose you.”

His voice hummed like resonance in the air. “If anyone has further doubts about the power or stability of the regime, you are welcome to see me for personal reassurance.”

had known, from the moment she’d seen the array on his back, that if he survived it, it would drive him to distil his world to a single point and he would never stray from it. He had made that point her.

Kaine said sharply. “She can’t be trusted.” He turned on Helena, and his resonance hummed ominously, the iron in the room giving a bone-shuddering groan.

“Kaine’s phylactery. It’s part of the outer bone of Morrough’s right arm.”

Helena rose up and spoke softly so her voice wouldn’t carry. “Tell me, truthfully, would you have been any different if you thought it could save your mother? Say no, and I’ll let you kill her.” His jaw clenched, and he lowered the knife. “Get out before I change my mind,” he said.

“We can do it together,” she said. “You should meet her.”

He glanced at Helena. “She very much remembers you. Howled for half the day when you arrived.”

He rested his head against Amaris, and her wings fluttered. She turned her neck to nip at him. “We’ll go out together, won’t we, old girl? Bennet’s last two monsters.”

Atreus turned sharply. There was a wet snick and a gasping burble as Aurelia stopped speaking.

“You planned that.” He froze for an instant. “What makes you say that?” His voice was light. “Because she’s a loose end. If you’ll let Amaris die, you won’t let Aurelia live.” His expression hardened. “What did you expect? She tried to gouge out your eyes.”

Soon this would be all that was left of Kaine in the whole world. “I’m going to take care of you,” she whispered. “It’s—our way.”

He exhaled. “He ripped out my heart first. Said it was—f-fitting…”

He’d start awake, still blind, searching for her, his fingers grasping, trying to feel her heartbeat.

She locked the copper back around her wrists herself.

Despite their contempt for each other, Kaine had inherited his fatal flaws from his father. Enid had been everything to Atreus, and now she was gone, and he was left grasping after shadows. What would Kaine be like with someone who glimmered with constant reminders of what he’d lost? Perhaps something like Atreus, who could neither stand his son nor stay away. She finally understood.

But every time he sees you, he hates you with your wife’s eyes.”

“But you won’t save Kaine by finding him. The killer you’re searching for is your son.”

“You came—” She reached for him. “I guess you always do.”

Kaine laughed bitterly. “They must have found you terribly amusing when they brought you back and you stayed loyal. And you called me the dog.”

Helena thought Kaine would ignore his father, but he looked at him. “It seems I am cursed to love as you do.”

He shook his head as they neared the door. “You need a willing soul for that, and you’re not going to find one, because the only person who’d die for me is you.”

“You promised we’d run away together,” she said. “Remember?” He dipped his head. “Why is it that I have to keep all my promises, but you never seem to keep a single one of yours?” She shook her head, tilting up her face so their foreheads touched. “The first promise I made to you was that I’d be yours for as long as I live. I’m keeping that one.”

Kaine stood there, not moving. “I never—I never told you—I’m sorry I couldn’t save any of you.”

“This will work,” she said. “I promise. I’m going to save you.”

“I need you,” she said. “We’re almost to the end now. But you have to come back to me. We’re running away, remember? You, me, and our baby. We’re going to be free. I’m going to save you, but I need you to fight with me.”

When she was done, Kaine lay still. She pressed her hand against his chest, feeling him. Alive and mortal.

“Your mother was always so proud of you. She said you were the best thing we ever made.” Then Atreus looked at Helena. “Save him.”

Before the Disaster, it was said people could travel by following the stars, but no one knew where they went anymore.

There were two narrow beds, but Helena and Kaine collapsed into one, not bothering to remove their boots or cloaks. “We did it, Kaine,” she said. “Just like we always said we would.”

“It’s nothing. I’m just not used to feeling—human anymore,” he said.

He tucked a curl behind her ear. “You already told me all this yesterday. You know, I do make a habit of listening when you talk.”

When Helena opened her eyes, Kaine was still asleep beside her, his face turned towards her as if he’d fallen asleep staring at her.

“Helena—Helena, breathe. Look at me. I’m going to be careful. I’m not going to let anything take me from you.”

He turned her so she’d face him. “Look at me. We have not left any trace to follow. I’ve hunted fugitives, I know how you get caught. And we are not going to get caught. You’ve seen me fight carelessly because I could afford to in the past, but I have learned to be more careful. Slower regeneration has taught me caution. Look at me: I trusted you, and you got us here. It’s your turn to trust me.”

“Don’t,” he said through gritted teeth. “Don’t act like it’s fine.” She pulled her hand free. “It is fine if I get you instead.”

She could see the possessiveness in his eyes, enough to realise how absent it had been in his attempts to let her go. He leaned over her and kissed her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, wanting him nearer, under her skin, beneath her ribs, inside her heart. To hoard him so close nothing separated them and the terror of losing him would finally end.

held her face in his hands. “Helena, look at you. You have broken yourself into pieces, over and over, because of me, and you don’t seem to understand that it kills me. Living is not worth it to me if you’re the one who keeps paying the price for it. Let me fix what I can.”

He sighed, tilting his head back. “I’ve killed so many people,” he finally said. “I never thought I’d get stuck on an animal of all things.”

“Someday,” he said softly, resting a hand on her shoulder, “your mercy is going to have consequences.” She held his hand in place. “There’s blood enough on both our hands without adding hers.” He squeezed her shoulder.

All this, while he hadn’t even known if she was alive.

“We said always, didn’t we?” she asked, her voice strained. “Always. Well, if you don’t want that promise in full any longer, I’ll give it to you in increments.” She clutched his hand tighter. “Every day. I’ll choose you. That way you’ll know it’s still what I want.”

“I’m sure there will be good days and bad days for us. Too much has happened to ever really put it behind us, but if you choose me, and I choose you, I think we’re strong enough to make it.”

She looked up as Kaine came out the door and immediately dropped to her belly and crawled across the ground to him, wings and tail flapping, whining and whimpering all the way. He pulled her enormous head into his arms.

His lips whispering perfect, beautiful, mine with every nip and caress. “Yours, always,” she’d promise.

“the way I would love her. She has to be that important to you. Do you promise?” Kaine had grown pale, but he nodded. “All right.” “Promise me.” “I promise.”

designating himself as obstetrician.