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“Don’t die, Marino. I might miss you.”
“Don’t die, Kaine,”
“All right, then, but only because you asked.”
“I guess you’re not really out there at the front, are you?
She wanted to stay there and freeze to death. She’d read it was a gentle way to go, like falling asleep.
“but only because you asked.”
Don’t trust me. Don’t trust the Eternal Flame. We’re all liars.
“You are a monster,”
Helena looked between them and then turned reluctantly and went out to the landing. She only heard Crowther utter one word before the door sealed shut: “Beg.”
“You could be a healer,”
My loyalty was to those least responsible for her suffering, but if the Eternal Flame has decided that you are an affordable casualty, I will not be noble or understanding. I can exact dual revenge. I will make them pay if they get you killed.”
“You are not expendable.
“Call me, and I will come.”
I’ll always come for you.”
It doesn’t matter what happens to you, you will still be mine.”
“I think I forgot to breathe after you left.”
“Don’t die, Kaine. You can’t leave me behind.”
“We had a good run, but we were never going to last.”
“I’m not fragile. I am not going to break. Please believe that about me.”
“You’re alive,” she said.
“You’re remembering, aren’t you?”
“—why did you kill everyone?” He seemed startled by the question, as if he’d expected one of the others. “I was trying to find you.”
“I know it’s illogical—being scared of the dark. I know,” she said, and her voice shook. “I’m trying—I know…”
I left a note. Didn’t you get my note? I love you.”
It’s strange…I don’t know why I have so much trouble remembering moments.”
“My mother’s name was Enid.”
For him, acknowledging that he would have a child, a daughter, meant acknowledging that he wouldn’t live to meet her. He was telling the stories so Helena could tell their daughter about him, about what he’d been like, before the Institute and the war.
“I love you,” she said, kissing him. “I wish I’d told you a thousand times.”
“We made a deal to tell the truth to each other, and that is the truth. You cannot save me. I cannot be saved.”
“I don’t want to choose. I always have to choose, and I never get to choose you. I’m so tired of not getting to choose you.”
“We’ll go out together, won’t we, old girl? Bennet’s last two monsters.”
“I didn’t make plans past the war because there were never any plans to make. Holdfast, the Eternal Flame, they were never going to win, and I always knew that. Falling for you didn’t change that—it just…it just made knowing worse.”
“You came—” She reached for him. “I guess you always do.”
People talk about Morrough, make jokes about him, but do you know who no one ever jokes about? The High Reeve. People look sick at the mere mention of him. His signatures and seal are everywhere. He was involved in everything. There was nothing that happened in that regime that Kaine didn’t know about.”
“There’s no version of me that survived the war without Kaine.
If he’s a monster, then I’m his creator.”
“Did you really think I was going to let her live?”
“I’m so glad she’s dead.”

