Gabor Maté, MD, an expert in trauma, addiction, and child development, and the author of The Myth of Normal, talks about this tension: An issue that comes up in a lot of people’s lives [is] the conflict we all experience between being ourselves, on the one hand, and being loved and accepted on the other. That’s what we want…But what if you can’t have both and the child can’t or perceives that they can’t. Then they go for the attachment, and they suppress themselves. Self-expression and authenticity become a threat to them. All our lives we are afraid to be ourselves. It’s not a mistake that we
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