I understand why some ears bleed at the sound of this laughter. It’s not evil. It’s not joyous. It’s a lonely sound. This being in front of me is what it is, and it cannot change. It lives in this place amid the damage and the chaos it reaps just by existing, and it breaks my heart because it’s so familiar to me. I love it and I hate it, and I admire it, aspire to be it, and I resent everything about it that I recognize within myself.
