He didn’t say anything about my artwork but suggested right away that we sit on the bed in our underwear. But L. wasn’t wearing underwear. Instead he had on diapers and rubber pants. I was not braced. L.’s favorite phrase was “a real turn-on.” Diapers were “a real turn-on,” as was being peed on and being five. “Daddy,” he said, “if I was your little boy, how would you dress me? Would my little rubber pants be tight?” I was a nervous wreck. L. was disappointed that I wouldn’t play along, and I think it was pretty clear I just wanted him to crawl home. I went into the kitchen for a long time,
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