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“Do you ever wake up sometimes… and think… ‘Gods, wouldn’t it be nice if I hadn’t just gone toe-to-toe with a scorpion demon from hell?’”
carrion is fucking hilarious
I opened my eyes, and there he was, holding his hand out to me again. For the second time in less than twenty-four hours, I let the smuggler help me to my feet. But this time, I was too tired to scowl at him all that much.
bromance of the century fr
Where I had thought her weak, she was strong. Her heart was bigger than the horizon half the time—too big for her own good. I’d misjudged her. She was incredible.
A nest of vipers writhed behind my rib cage. They wanted me to punch Carrion in the face. Hard. But it was exhausting, this blind anger I harbored toward the male. It served no purpose.
When I looked up, Carrion was watching me. “Go on,” he said. “Ask.” It was beneath me to pretend that I didn’t know what he was talking about. So I asked. “Are you in love with her?”
“No,” he said simply. And then, immediately, “Yes?”
“It’s not a simple thing, Fisher. She’s… well…” “Spectacular,” I whispered.
Her fire keeps others warm in the cold dark. It is her strength, not her weakness. Being around her reminds you that you’re alive.”
No, I couldn’t blame the male for seeing what was obvious. I could only pity him that she wasn’t his and be fucking thankful that she was mine.
“Every year that I live, it seems the magnitude of my loss eclipses the last. So yes. I love Saeris Fane, because she’s electric, and fierce, and loyal, and being around her brings the world back into focus. But I’m not in love with her, Fisher. I tried. But my heart was just too full of sorrow to make room for her.”
and now im crying because carrion deserves love omg
“You barely even flinched today,”
“The pain of that venom. The pain of your dead.”
“Will you show me?” “Show you?” “How to close it off. To shut it all down, so I don’t have to feel it anymore?” Sinners. I puffed out my cheeks, unable to look ...
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“I don’t know. The damned thing’s been following me around in my dreams for a couple of weeks now. Even when he was back in Cahlish.”
“You know, the fake annoyance isn’t necessary anymore. I know you love him, and so does he.”
“I’d say we tolerate each other at best,”
“I’ve seen you with him when you think I’m not looking. And why would he already be here with you, in this, what, this dream space, if he didn’t love you?”
“Just accept it. My fox is your fox, too.”
“Your heart’s racing, Saeris Fane. Why might that be?”
“The most unique, most beautiful creature in the entire realm, on her knees in front of me, looking up at me like she’s feeling feral and might just like to fuck me? Yes,” he said, “I’d say I’m feeling pretty pleased with myself.”
“It’s complicated. But the short version of it is this: Everlayne was in love with Taladaius once. They were betrothed. And the night before they were due to be married, Tal fled the Winter Palace, against his father’s wishes and his king’s command, and he knelt at the feet of Sanasroth’s throne.” “Willingly?” Kingfisher nodded. “But why? If he hated Malcolm and all he stood for, then why would he have done such a thing?” “Why does any male act recklessly, Saeris? He did it because he was in love with someone else. He did it for Zovena.”
“She isn’t my girlfriend, Carrion.”
“Your relationship status with Saeris Fane was the least important thing I just said, Kingfisher.”
“You think I’m pathetic. Obsessive. You think I was stupid, sitting here every night, copying all this out of a book like some kind of heartsick moron. It’s okay. You can say it. I have very thick skin these days. It doesn’t bother me. Not anymore.”
“I see a male longing for a place and a people he has never known,” I said simply. “That’s all.” I gave him the drawing as I passed him, leaving his room. “You should keep hold of that, Carrion,” I told him. “Bring it home with you.”
If he had used any other analogy, literally any other, I wouldn’t have had any qualms about ignoring him. But he had used that one, and it tore at a buried hurt deep inside me that still woke me, sweating, from my dreams sometimes. Did he know somehow? About my father? No, he couldn’t have.
excuse me???
With a pang of sadness, I slipped it into my pocket and left.
I could not find a scrap of his sister in him. If I’d passed Hayden Fane in the halls of the Winter Palace, I would never have known he was related to my mate. Not on a surface level. But then, there was the matter of his blood.
interesting
“Y’know, sarcasm is a form of humor. The lowest, basest form, yes, but it still counts. If you’re not careful, I’ll start to think I’m rubbing off on you.” “Don’t use the word rub and then refer to me in the same sentence, please,”
“Oh, I know you,”
“You’re him, aren’t you? Kingfisher of the Ajun Gate, whatever that is. Look, there! I can see it on your face. I’m right, aren’t I?”
“How do you know his name?”
I caught him by the back of his shirt and held him up. The poor bastard’s face and neck were still marked from Joshin’s stingers. He looked exhausted. Ready to give up. He nodded, breathing deep, indicating that he could stand on his own, but rather than letting him go, I pulled him into a hug. Saeris wasn’t here. But if she was, this is what she would have done for him. Carrion immediately tried to pull away, but I hugged him tighter—too tight, maybe—refusing to let him go. He sagged, burying a single, choked cry into my chest, and that was all I heard out of him. His body rocked with silent
...more
Sobbing in real time
If at any point, you underestimate me…” He smirked, arching a dark copper eyebrow. “Then I’d say that was your mistake rather than mine. Wouldn’t you?”
“That’s the Swift boy. I always knew there was something wrong about him.”
