Wanted by the Alien Warden (Cowboy Colony Mail-Order Brides, #4)

by Ursa Dax

I was completely blinded by the man’s boobs. Professional, Tasha! You’re a professional!

“Yes!” A massive smile split his face, and it was so big and so pure that I almost didn’t even notice the sharp glint of fangs there. “I am eternally grateful to be able to say that I am, indeed, Darcy’s husband!”

“Yes,” Fallon breathed, his eyes now very, very bright white. “Without you and your most illuminating guide, I would not know about the wonders of the clitorosaurus.”

A typo. On that word. I was going to die. Just… Quietly pass away at the thought. Surrender to the sweet embrace of death so I didn’t have to confront the fact that I’d misspelled fucking clitoris.

“I apologize,” Fallon said gravely. “Of course, I meant the clitorosseum.”

Silar appeared to have something to add on the subject, muttering under his breath about frostbite, nipples, and when, exactly, was he supposed to worry about cold water?

“I would just like to interject,” said a slightly frantic-sounding Oaken, “that I have never actually murdered anyone! And I would very much still like a bride if there is one yet willing and available!”

I did not know that human females ate meals shaped into squares. This was good, if odd, information.

Warden Tenn had managed to strike me smack dab in the middle of my biggest, squishiest insecurity. The fear that I wasn’t doing a good job. That I was failing, not only myself, but others, too.

“I am busy,” he bit out testily. “But I…” “But you what?” White streaked through his eyes, then disappeared. He hitched up his pants by his belt and fiercely uttered the next words. “But I’d make time for you.”

“I am trying to ascertain,” he said grumpily – grumpily! The nerve of this man! – “why your stomach does not like me.”

🤣🤣🤣

I felt a subtle, sudden creep of loneliness, like an intruder stealing through me in the dark, hoping to cause some secret pain before I noticed and beat it back down.

😭😭😭😭

“You are very talented. It’s just, your talents apparently lie less in drawing Zabrian dicks and more in drawing-” She glanced down at Cherry’s screen. “-a lopsided sausage with a bit of droopy spaghetti tacked on the end.”

Omg 🤦🏽‍♀️

Warden Tenn looks like he’d be girthy.

😏😏😏🍆🍆🍆🍆

Now stop arguing with me and tell me what sort of jamdanglies you’d like.”