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“No,” Reggie grunts. “I’m sorry if you’re upset, Lyla. But this marriage is important to me.”
One paragraph.
One leg hitched on a chair, dressed pushed up over her hips,
"dress" pushed up…
He looks annoyingly good for someone who just walked in on me in shorts and bed hair.
She walked in on him, not the other way around.
By the time we hit downtown, the air’s cooler, but I’ve got a heat inside me. Bella sits beside me, legs crossed, hair pinned up in a way that makes it look like she didn’t try too hard. Which means she tried just enough to wreck me.
This is a weird transition from her walking out of Reggie's side of the house to Rowen's. I'm still not sure if that is what happened at the end of the last chapter or if this is another day.
“My space buns.” She smiles. “You don’t like them?” She frowns.
One paragraph
“Reg?” Drago says. “Yes. Fine,” I say sharply. “Want me to cut this? Have you seen enough?” I run my fingers through my hair.
This scene needs to be set better. A better revealing of Reggie spying on them and reason for doing so.
The plane dips, and Bella grips the armrest between us. I almost reach out before I catch myself. She squeezes my hand but doesn’t make eye contact. I don’t let go, because I can’t.
So he did reach out since she's gripping him?
As Rowan slows to a run for the door, Reggie catches up to us.
…slows "in his" run for the door…
I get in the back with her and slide shut behind us, I finally let out the breath I’ve been holding.
…slid "the door" shut
so I save what happened in Phoenix a secret.
…so I "keep" what happened…
the same I don’t talk about mine either.
…the same "way"…
As soon as Rowan text me saying Lyla had been in contact, I knew I had to do something.
Rowan "texted" me…
“Let me dig deeper with Enzo,” I say. “No trace is a red flag. I’ll monitor Inferno feeds, see what she’s doing,” Drago adds.
Two paragraphs as there are two speakers.
There’s one chair in the middle with restraints on the arms like a throne.
Restraints aren't on thrones and therefore don’t make a chair a throne. How about, "A chair sits in the middle of the room like a throne, but this throne has arm restraints."
“Ain’t that the truth.”
Who says this?
As I lead them into the next room and close the door.
Incomplete sentence.
My pulse kicks hard. The name alone makes my blood run colder. “Just follow my
What name?
“Declan…” “We’ve got a serious fucking problem. Lock down Decadence. Now!”
One paragraph.
Finn speaks up next, calm but firm. “We’ll need medical checks on every girl who’s worked under Eve’s roster. Psychological evaluations, blood tests, full documentation. Anyone showing recruitment markers gets isolated and debriefed.”
How do they know Eve's roster?
