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His eyes were burning with tears again, which was embarrassing and inappropriate after amazing sex. “Thank you,” he said into Shane’s hair. It was so unlike Shane to be impulsive like this. To drive to Ottawa in the middle of the night for some quick sex.
But it was also unlike Ilya to cry after sex, so everyone was experienci...
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Ilya sniffled, and hoped Shane didn’t notice.
Shane flicked Ilya’s left pec, over the breastplate. “You’re in no position to be making fun of other people’s tattoos.” He smiled up at Ilya, and Ilya smiled back, overwhelmed by how much he loved this man.
Ilya watched him go, giving himself a moment to take some deep breaths and try to settle whatever was happening inside him.
He stood on his front step for several minutes after, staring in the direction the car had gone, and shivering in his gym shorts and T-shirt. Then, he went inside, closed the door, and burst into tears.
When he’d finished crying, some uncertain amount of time later, he felt more exhausted than he had after any hockey game. He was crumpled on the floor, slumped against his front door, and standing up seemed like an insurmountable feat. He decided that, yes. He should probably get some professional help.
“It’s nice to talk to someone in Russian.” “Has it been a while?” Ilya considered it.
“It’s been a long time.” He smiled wryly. “I may not be able to shut up.” “That’s what I’m here for. Would you like to come in?” She took a step toward the open door of her office. “Of course, yes.”
As you probably know, mental health isn’t a popular concept among our people.” Ilya was very aware of that. “No. It isn’t. Not for hockey players either.”
“That’s true. But you’re a Russian hockey player, and you’ve been outspoken about mental health issues. The charity you started is doing good work,” she said. “I’ve been following your progress with it. I’m very impressed.”
“You told me you haven’t tried therapy before, even though you seem to be quite knowledgeable about mental health. What made you decide to book this appointment?”
