The Long Game (Game Changers, #6)

by Rachel Reid

This book is for the Shane and Ilya fans. Thanks for making this happen.

“You smoke.” “Almost never.” “You had a cigarette last night.” “How do you know?” “I have a nose.” Ilya booped the tip of Shane’s nose. “A cute one.”

“Not to ask a stupid question, but it’s serious?” “Very,” Ilya said. Shane’s heart flipped the way it always did when Ilya made it clear how much Shane meant to him.

Shane loved Ilya so much it physically hurt to contain it some days.

Shane would do it. He would do anything for Ilya. He’d told him, once, that he was willing to play the long game when it came to their relationship and he’d meant it.

Ilya felt a lot of things at once, both from the way Shane’s track pants pulled tight against his thigh muscles, and from the warmth that bloomed in Ilya’s chest whenever he watched Shane interact with children.

He was terrified that one day Shane would realize he could be with someone who wasn’t a dark secret. That it could be easy to love someone.

He closed his eyes and focused on how good it felt to be with Shane, alone in the dark, and tried not to wish it could be the same in the light.

“I am Ilya. This is my... Shane.”

“We are very good at pretending to not be in love. Maybe we are bad at showing it when we are allowed.”

Sometimes Ilya was so starved for touch he felt like screaming. He felt it most when Shane was close, like he was now, but off-limits.

Kiss me, Ilya wanted to say. Kiss me and hold me in front of all these people. Pull me onstage and do it. I don’t care anymore. Please. I’m dying. “Nothing,” Ilya said, and stepped away. “Nothing.”

Mine, Shane thought. The world doesn’t need to know, because I know.

“I would never stop showing you off,” Ilya said. “If I could.”

Ilya laughed into Shane’s mouth and kept kissing him. Shane wondered if Ilya was as dizzy with happiness as he was. Sometimes he still couldn’t believe they were actually together. That Shane could have this.

He reached his free hand up and caressed Shane’s cheek. “My beloved,” Ilya murmured, in Russian. “So beautiful.”

God, Shane loved it when Ilya used his last name, the way he’d used to, before. Back when they’d used to fuck but before they were...this.

It would be, altogether, their eleventh NHL season of hiding. Seven seasons of secret hookups, and three seasons of being in a mostly secret committed relationship. It had been a lot of hiding.

Shane punched his arm, then captured Ilya’s lips in a sweet kiss. He tasted like coffee and home, and Ilya really wished he didn’t need to leave.

“Ya lyublyu tebya.” “Ya vsegda budu tebya lubit,”

“You little shit.” Shane laughed in face of his boyfriend’s fury. “Did you like that?” “How did you learn it?” “Like it’s hard,”

“I want to touch you. I miss you.” “I always miss you.”

“You look hot.” “Probably.”

“You are so fucking beautiful,” Shane said. Ilya smiled at him in that crooked way that had been making Shane feel crazy for over ten years. “Tell me.” “As if you don’t know how hot you are.” “Tell me anyway.”

“You’re so fucking big. Like, everywhere. Your arms, your chest, your fucking thighs. I love how tall you are. I don’t even care that you make fun of my height because I fucking love being swallowed up by you when we’re together.”

The pain of not being in the same room as Ilya felt physical.

“I know we’re careful, but...” “Someone might notice my heart eyes.” “Your what?” “Heart eyes. Hayden said I look at you with heart eyes.”

“Yes. Was probably true. I look at you and I am just...” Ilya opened and closed his fist several times in front of his chest. “My heart goes crazy, you know?” Shane’s own heart started going a little crazy. “You should see a doctor about that.” Ilya grinned and shook his head. “Is just being in love, I think.”

Ilya bent over the face-off circle in Montreal and smiled at the man across from him. “Hi.” Shane’s lips quirked up. “Hi.”

Ilya stretched out beside Shane, then rolled him so he could spoon him from behind. Shane curled against him easily—automatically—holding Ilya’s hand where it lay in front of Shane’s belly.

“When you watch it, this is what you will see. Me saying nothing. I wanted to say you are fucking everything to me. Everything. Okay?”

Everyone watched as Shane bent over Ilya’s hand, concentrating intensely as he brushed polish on each nail. Ilya’s heart fluttered at the sweetness of it.

Ilya grinned at Shane. “What do you say, sweetheart?”

“This is the wedding of Shane Hollander and Ilya...” Jade narrowed her eyes at Ilya. “Rozanov,” he supplied. She nodded. “Rose-noff.” Shane snickered, and Ilya nudged him. “Shane. Keep it together. Is our wedding day.”

“Shane, do you promise to love Ilya and be his husband forever?” Ruby asked. Shane gazed at his ridiculous-looking boyfriend, who smiled back at him. One of the flowers on his headband was holding on by a thread, dangling in front of Ilya’s raised left eyebrow. Suddenly—absurdly—Shane’s throat felt tight. “I do,” he said quietly, and with an embarrassing amount of feeling. “Ilya,” said Jade, “do you promise to love Shane and be his husband forever?” “I do,” Ilya said. “Forever.”

When they broke the kiss, Ilya said, “You will be a good dad.” Shane rested his forehead on Ilya’s shoulder and smiled. “Not as good as you.”

Shane didn’t need any costume pieces to look like a fantasy. He was absolutely beautiful, on his knees for Ilya. He was always so beautiful.

He smiled up at Ilya, and Ilya smiled back, overwhelmed by how much he loved this man.

Maybe therapy, like so many things worth doing, hurts when you first start.

He’d been an idiot then. He still was, really, when it came to Shane Hollander.

They both laughed, and Shane’s heart flipped happily in his chest. He loved quiet, domestic moments like this with Ilya. He loved joking about sex and laughing together.

“I love you,” Shane said, the words out before he’d known he was going to say them. Ilya’s smile turned bashful and sweet. “I still like to hear that.” “I still like saying it.”

“How could they not know?” Shane said. “How could anyone have seen this—seen you—and not known about us?” Ilya had displayed his heart so openly, smashed against the ice as unmistakably as Shane’s broken body.

Shane’s heart swelled. This beautiful man was all his.

“I am so glad I met you,” Ilya said quietly. Shane’s heart clenched.

He reached for Ilya’s hand and held it tight, fingers woven together. There was absolutely nowhere else Shane wanted to be.

“Everything is someday. I am tired of waiting for someday.”

Ilya was a bad influence. But maybe Shane had needed that in his life.

Shane loved it too. Loved that Ilya could do this to him. It was terrifying and wonderful to feel so free in this man’s arms.

Quietly, in a voice that couldn’t disguise his pain, he said, “I already chose you, Hollander.”