Carly: OMFG I just had a dorm inspection and totally forgot to tidy my room. Bro. BRO!! I had left a butt plug and a giant bottle of lube on my bedside table!!!! RIP me, please say nice things at my funeral. Fuck my life. Ashley: Sweet, does that mean I get your new LV handbag? Carly: Fuck you! But yes, it’s in my will. Treat her well.
