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Folks loved to bring up what they’ve done for you when they can’t have their way.
I’d never been so attracted to a man I couldn’t stand until I met Murk. Sexy dumbass.
No one would ever have a chance to break my heart because it wasn’t up for grabs.
“Y’all are acting like you haven’t seen each other in weeks when it’s only been an hour.” “Damn, shorty. You sound like a hater. Don’t be mad because no one misses you,” Murk interjected. “Boy, fuck you! I’ve never been a hater. Trust me; I’m always on a nigga’s mind, including yours,” I spat. I guess I’d already failed at not arguing, but he started it.
“You might be flat-chested like a twelve-year-old boy, but that ass is fatter than two honeydew melons in a burlap sack.” “Go to hell, Murk!” I flipped him off before heading to my room.
“Yeah, okay. Well, I suggest you get some headphones when I bring one of these men back to the house,” she declared with her arms crossed. “I hear you. When you wake up and find your little friend floating in the pool, I hope you can live with yourself.”
“I’m sorry, friend. I promise I’ma get you together. We can’t have you scaring the hos.”
“Damn right. And when your ass is laid up in the hospital full of parasites, I’ma pretend to be your husband and tell them to pull the plug.”
“You might want to slow down before you end up passed out somewhere.” “I’m with you, so that means I’m safe, right?” Our eyes locked, and for a moment, I felt stuck. “Yeah. You’re always safe with me.”
I wanted to give her everything I withheld from everyone else.
“You’re fine as hell, but your forehead is big as fuck,” Murk blurted. I almost choked on the sweet tea I’d taken a few sips of. “Murk! What is wrong with you?” “My bad, baby. I thought I was tripping, but it looks much bigger in the camera. You could pass for Tyra Bank’s cousin with that five-head.”
“Close your mouth before I put this summer sausage in it.”
I’m not a romantic ass nigga, but I miss you and your big ass forehead. The realest mothafucka you know, Murk
“Once I get my line-up, I’ll be even finer if that’s even possible. I mean, damn!”
There ain’t too many things these hollow tips can’t pierce through. I’m on my way.
“Get yo’ ass in the car. You’ve got me out here in the middle of nowhere because your hot pussy ass wants to fuck with somebody’s crusty uncle.” I fumed. “Aren’t you someone’s uncle?”
Me: This could be us, but you keep taking that stupid birth control. Puma P: Don’t miss a single day! Me: I see you’ve got jokes, but I’ma get your ass one of these days.
“Neither of us had the best upbringing, but that’s okay. We’ll be able to give our babies everything we never had.”
She gave the kind of hugs I imagined a real grandmother would give.
“Let me find out you used to be a stud or some shit. Strong ass.”
“Don’t play with me, Puma P. Because I’ve never had my heart broken before. I’ll mess around and pour red Kool-Aid in your gas tank then cut your locs off while you sleep.”
“Damn right. You fucked up when you let me give you my heart cause I’m never letting you go. I’m tryna build a life with you and go half on a few babies too.”
“I ain’t gonna lie; if you go before me, they might as well bury me next to you because, otherwise, I’m painting the whole city red until I feel better.”
“And I mean every word. Now that I’ve gotten a taste of your love, I’d rather die than be without it.”
“That ass is looking real fat, baby. Go ahead and make it clap,” I teased, slapping him on the rear.
“Wrong. Puma, I’ll throw you out of here like Uncle Phil used to do Jazz in Fresh Prince. Don’t even try me like that. Over there being a creep.”
Puma thought we were over, but I was only giving her space. She was mine, and the only way I would let her go was over my dead body.
“You don’t seem like yourself. You haven’t cracked one joke in the last three days, and I just knew you were gonna roast me when I showed up with this tight ass shirt on. Are you good?”
“How do I look?” Puma asked as she turned in a circle so I could see the full outfit. “Baby, what the hell do you have on?” There weren’t enough words to describe how ugly her shirt was.
