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I want to take it easy on him and give him the rest of the night to come to terms with everything he’s just learned. But the other part of me wants to remind him that he belongs to me now, and choice is no longer an option for him.
Why am I doing this? Plying my captor to make him less abusive to me? I’m such a fuck-up.
Yes, I’m a fucking hypocrite because I told him I wasn’t gay. I don’t know what I am. Insane, probably. Because Krypt is the only one who sees everything within me and doesn’t balk at the challenge of me.
Walk the fuck over there and challenge him. I’m right here.” I’m right here. I’ve never had anyone at my back before, and it’s enough to make me lift my chin and straighten my spine.
if this is my fate—if you are my fate—then… then a sick part of me wants to revel in you.”
His dominance entices a sinister side of me that wants to fight—that wants to force him to make me submit. Against my will. Without my consent. I’ve never had a say in anything, and apparently, I don’t want one with him either.
“I need your sickness more than I need anything. Fucking give it to me, Krypt.”
“Why can’t I hate you and want you? Why can’t I be disgusted by the things you’ve done and need you anyway?
There’s a need inside me that wants to wipe him from the face of the earth and turn him into a phantom soul only I control. I want him to be my secret, my saviour, and my downfall. Because I’ve always been sick, but Remiel makes me sicker.
Maybe he trusts that I won’t harm him, but he’s going to find out how wrong he is about that. I won’t kill him. But I’ll hurt him.
Because Remiel Sauder has become everything to me. My property. My obsession. My fixation. My dream. I’ve never dreamed before.
“I pick you as mine. I pick you to turn me into something I’ve never been before. I choose you to show me a way of life I’ve never lived. I don’t need you, Krypt. I fucking want you.”
Two best friends, drinking beer in the middle of the night, talking about our sexual assaults like they weren’t assaults. No wonder we live in Moros. We’re as twisted as this town is.
His brokenness led him to me, and my brokenness helped empower him. We’re matched in pain, but both undeserving of each other.
I want to skip the dating phase and go straight to ownership and possession. He’s either mine or he’s dead. There is no in-between.
You taught me to fight back. To bring forth my darker parts. To let them out because you can handle them. You scare the shit out of me, Keegan, but you make me feel more alive than I’ve ever been before. So,
I don’t know what love is, but I know what obsession is, and Remiel is the focus of my life.
“Being important to me is not an easy thing to be. It’s going to hurt. It’s going to hurt so much more than it feels good.”
But if you’re sick, Remiel, if whatever pumps through your heart and coats your brain is a sickness, it’s a fucking blessing. Not an insult.” I pick up the leather strap and hold it in front of his mouth. “I want you, too, Remiel. I pick you, too.”
Krypt has brought me back to life by making me hurt. Numbness isn’t living; being battered and bruised is.
A couple. Is that what we are? Not a very healthy one.
I don’t usually get nervous about jobs, but I’m nervous now. Because I have something to lose. A person to give up.
“I think you forced him to get to know himself, and as much as it ruined who he was, it strengthened him.”
Nothing about us is healthy or even moral, but sometimes, two wrongs do make a right, and together, we’re something close to warped perfection.
Once seen, eye contact comfortable, he latched onto one of the only people brave enough to look into his eyes. Me.
“I’m whatever you turned me into. You woke up all my hidden parts, and this is what you get. I’m yours, Krypt. Keegan. I’m fucking yours.”
In sickness, we found our health.
“I was yours the night I walked into Vile House. Free or not, I’m fucking yours.”
I have a family. A brother, a sister, a best friend, a Krypt. Things to fight for and a reason to exist. I’m important and wanted.
“I chose to die from my life to willingly live in a nightmare,”
He is love. He is obsession. He is mine, and I am his, and not even death, fate, or a fucking suicide curse will tear us apart.
Every part of my life is dictated by you now. When you’re gone, I feel you stalking me. When you’re near, I’m attracted to your monsters. When I sleep, you haunt my dreams.
“Our sick bargain, Remiel. The one that will take us into forever and teach us to be sick and sinister together.”
Krypt will wash me of my sins and decorate me with new ones just to cleanse me forever.
